I'm struggling with myself again today. Feelings of inadequacy and not feeling important or wanted are starting to really gnaw at my thoughts and heart. I know that I'm in a great position in life: married, able to afford groceries and small splurges every week, a great husband, a job, and a car. But ever since I woke up, I haven't been able to get past the thoughts of worthlessness, lack of self-confidence, and the inability to be myself. Many times I feel stupid because I can't seem to figure out the simple things in life like depositing a check correctly or choosing the right time to get a particular item at the grocery store. I do have my own opinion of how to do certain things, like depositing that check or deciding which item to get when. But my opinion and ways of doing things seems second best. I've developed an attitude of apathy because I've convinced myself that my ways, my opinions are not the best...so I automatically go with someone else's ideas or opinions. I really have compromised my individuality when I developed that attitude of apathy. I no longer make an effort to voice my opinion or my thoughts on everyday things. Maybe part of the reason is because I feel like I will get shot down or blown off because my ideas aren't as good as someone else.
Something else that might be contributing to my emotional strain today is the harsh reality that I have been living in a completely new area for five months now and I still don't have anyone to call my friend, besides my husband. I am alone...and it sucks. So who can I turn to when I'm struggling, who can I turn to when my day is off kilter from the very start, who can I turn to when I need a change of pace from the day-to-day monotony? I started thinking of the familiar places I knew when I was younger and people who I could call up and hang out with regularly on a Friday night or at school. Then I think back to where I am now. A new place, new people, and not a hint of anything familiar.
As you can probably tell, my faith has been weakening. I'm starting to realize that my sense of security has been refocused to thoughts of who I used to be and the things I used to know; instead of on the true sense of security: God. I can bottle up my feelings for quite a long time until they start eating away at me, like they are now. I have no excitement for the Word, or getting back that time I had with God. I know He's there waiting for me to rekindle our friendship but I don't think I can keep up this solo act. I need encouragement and a familiar face. If you're reading this, please say a quick prayer for me. To know that someone's simply praying for me will help so much. I will make an effort to get my faith back where it needs to be; on the things above, not on the things of this earth. It's going to be a struggle, since I am so overcome by my thoughts and feelings right now. God, You are the Answer to all my questions, the comfort and security in every time of uncertainty and self-doubt, the great big hug when I, as your child, am wandering aimlessly in the midst of my own thoughts and feelings. Please help me become the person You want me to be, and to deal with these emotions properly. I'm breaking down and I'm becoming as soft clay in Your hands. Thank you for your patience with me. I love you, Lord.
Thursday, October 13, 2011
Saturday, October 8, 2011
Lies
I need to admit to myself that I have been struggling with feelings of inadequacy. They are lies that Satan has been telling me for years but I've not succeeded in ignoring them recently. I find it best if I write my thoughts down, hence this blog, so I am going to list what I've been feeling:
Satan's lies (and maybe some of them are true...):
-too shy
-too quiet
-can't think for myself
-not assertive enough
-too clumsy
-not good enough
-too geeky
-push-over
-not loving enough
-no common sense
-too awkward
-not "spiritual" enough
-can't communicate well
-talk too fast
-think too much
-too indecisive
-too poor
-too sheltered
-not the person people need me to be
-not the person people want me to be
-too much of a loner
That's all I can think of for right now... As a Christian, I know that not all of these are true, but it's so easy to believe them more often than not. I'm asking for help, spiritual guidance, and simply a listening ear. And thank you for doing just that. God bless.
Satan's lies (and maybe some of them are true...):
-too shy
-too quiet
-can't think for myself
-not assertive enough
-too clumsy
-not good enough
-too geeky
-push-over
-not loving enough
-no common sense
-too awkward
-not "spiritual" enough
-can't communicate well
-talk too fast
-think too much
-too indecisive
-too poor
-too sheltered
-not the person people need me to be
-not the person people want me to be
-too much of a loner
That's all I can think of for right now... As a Christian, I know that not all of these are true, but it's so easy to believe them more often than not. I'm asking for help, spiritual guidance, and simply a listening ear. And thank you for doing just that. God bless.
Thursday, October 6, 2011
Difference Between Religion and Relationship?
What is religion? It can be the basis for answers to life’s mysteries and it can be a labyrinth of rules and regulations by which to align your lifestyle. But, what if you simply want to live a better life without getting mixed up in all the stipulations and traditions that come with getting mixed in with a certain religion, or denomination for that matter? A new friend of mine started to ask questions about Judgment and what happens when we die; do we go straight to Heaven or Hell when we die or is there a waiting period for everyone who does die until the Day of Judgment comes? After some friendly debating with a few other “religious” people, we concluded that it really comes down to one’s own beliefs and what feels right to them. Then, you can choose which church to attend depending on how well that church fits your personal interests and beliefs. Or is that the correct conclusion? I don’t believe so.
It took some effort for me not to go into a speech of how the Bible is the ultimate authority, no questions asked. Maybe I should have though because the Bible truly is the basis of all truth and the ultimate survival guide to living life according to the will of God. However, I didn’t think it was appropriate at the time to expound on that. Let’s go back to what religion is. Personally, I think that religion is a group of many different categories, a.k.a. denominations, that basically say the same thing but some with either fundamental or subtle differences. For instance, the Islam religion states one way to “salvation” and has its own explanation of what happens after we die. Christianity, on the other hand, also has a definition of salvation and what happens after we die. But what distinguishes one religion from the next? Is there a “right” religion? Is there an overarching principle that sets one apart from the others? If one believes that the Bible is the authoritative Word of God and is divinely inspired, then yes, one religion does trump the others, and whips them at their own game in the process. However, the question still arises about how do we know which religion is the “right” religion especially if someone doesn’t have as much of an understanding of the Bible as, say, a student studying to be a Bible major? What is one hugely fundamental trait that sets one religion completely apart from the rest? Consider this: Buddha was the head “prophet” per se in Buddhism. However, he’s dead. Mohammed was the prophet of Islam. He has a problem as well; he’s dead. Jesus Christ was the “prophet” of Christianity. According to the Bible, he was dead…but he rose again. He conquered death! I don’t know about you, but I would much rather have a personal relationship with someone who’s still alive and can master the powers of death rather than a dead guy who’s still getting to know his grave. That’s one hugely fundamental trait that sets one particular religion apart from the rest; the fact that we can have a personal relationship with the main character of the most important book ever written! And, who is capable of reciprocating that relationship back to those who follow him!
Back to the conversation with my friend. If only I had the time and the conviction to have taken the conversation a step farther. She and another friend who were sitting with me while we discussed religious issues were having a difficult time finding religion worth their time. They were overwhelmed a bit apprehensive at the fact that there was so much to religion (going back to the rules and regulations issue above). True, there is a LOT of background info and different quirks behind every denomination. But, the fact is the relationship between you and the one who defeated death itself for your sake is so much easier to take in and understand. The rest comes with committing your entire life to getting to know him better and to know his will for you life. May God give us the opportunity to take the conversation one step further so those completely overwhelmed by the nuances of religion can understand the reason for it all. One thing that my friend said that really struck me was, “There’s just so much to religion, I don’t think I could ever learn about it to be want to be religious”. Ouch. If that’s the only thing hindering them from possibly entering a relationship with Christ, we’ve got some clarifying to do, brothers and sisters. May we grab the chance to explain the importance between religion and relationship.
It took some effort for me not to go into a speech of how the Bible is the ultimate authority, no questions asked. Maybe I should have though because the Bible truly is the basis of all truth and the ultimate survival guide to living life according to the will of God. However, I didn’t think it was appropriate at the time to expound on that. Let’s go back to what religion is. Personally, I think that religion is a group of many different categories, a.k.a. denominations, that basically say the same thing but some with either fundamental or subtle differences. For instance, the Islam religion states one way to “salvation” and has its own explanation of what happens after we die. Christianity, on the other hand, also has a definition of salvation and what happens after we die. But what distinguishes one religion from the next? Is there a “right” religion? Is there an overarching principle that sets one apart from the others? If one believes that the Bible is the authoritative Word of God and is divinely inspired, then yes, one religion does trump the others, and whips them at their own game in the process. However, the question still arises about how do we know which religion is the “right” religion especially if someone doesn’t have as much of an understanding of the Bible as, say, a student studying to be a Bible major? What is one hugely fundamental trait that sets one religion completely apart from the rest? Consider this: Buddha was the head “prophet” per se in Buddhism. However, he’s dead. Mohammed was the prophet of Islam. He has a problem as well; he’s dead. Jesus Christ was the “prophet” of Christianity. According to the Bible, he was dead…but he rose again. He conquered death! I don’t know about you, but I would much rather have a personal relationship with someone who’s still alive and can master the powers of death rather than a dead guy who’s still getting to know his grave. That’s one hugely fundamental trait that sets one particular religion apart from the rest; the fact that we can have a personal relationship with the main character of the most important book ever written! And, who is capable of reciprocating that relationship back to those who follow him!
Back to the conversation with my friend. If only I had the time and the conviction to have taken the conversation a step farther. She and another friend who were sitting with me while we discussed religious issues were having a difficult time finding religion worth their time. They were overwhelmed a bit apprehensive at the fact that there was so much to religion (going back to the rules and regulations issue above). True, there is a LOT of background info and different quirks behind every denomination. But, the fact is the relationship between you and the one who defeated death itself for your sake is so much easier to take in and understand. The rest comes with committing your entire life to getting to know him better and to know his will for you life. May God give us the opportunity to take the conversation one step further so those completely overwhelmed by the nuances of religion can understand the reason for it all. One thing that my friend said that really struck me was, “There’s just so much to religion, I don’t think I could ever learn about it to be want to be religious”. Ouch. If that’s the only thing hindering them from possibly entering a relationship with Christ, we’ve got some clarifying to do, brothers and sisters. May we grab the chance to explain the importance between religion and relationship.
Friday, July 1, 2011
Chance of a Lifetime
Ever since I started college I told God I was content with remaining single the rest of my life. I had a female professor who was so much in love with God that it was somewhat of an inspiration to me to live my life similar to how she lived hers. I had a good core group of girls from my Bible study who were all okay with being single which continued to solidify my contentedness.
Of course, God's opinion is much better than my own and He must have been laughing when I first told Him I was willing to be single the rest of my life because my freshman year a random guy came up to me, noticed where I was from by my high school letterman jacket, and introduced himself. It so happens that we ended up hanging out a lot the next year and eventually started dating. Yes, God does have a sense of humor, and yes, He certainly does know what is best for us.
I can now say that we are extremely blessed to have been married for just short of two months now. It has been the experience of a lifetime. There's no other happiness than sharing life everyday with your best friend. God continues to bring us closer together and to Him while allowing us to experience married life with all its joys and harder times. I'm so thankful Dustin had the courage to ask me to marry him, I couldn't ask for a better husband; he has always been my best friend since we've known each other. It truly is a chance of a lifetime to be his partner for the rest of our lives. God, thank you so much for Dustin and our marriage!
Of course, God's opinion is much better than my own and He must have been laughing when I first told Him I was willing to be single the rest of my life because my freshman year a random guy came up to me, noticed where I was from by my high school letterman jacket, and introduced himself. It so happens that we ended up hanging out a lot the next year and eventually started dating. Yes, God does have a sense of humor, and yes, He certainly does know what is best for us.
I can now say that we are extremely blessed to have been married for just short of two months now. It has been the experience of a lifetime. There's no other happiness than sharing life everyday with your best friend. God continues to bring us closer together and to Him while allowing us to experience married life with all its joys and harder times. I'm so thankful Dustin had the courage to ask me to marry him, I couldn't ask for a better husband; he has always been my best friend since we've known each other. It truly is a chance of a lifetime to be his partner for the rest of our lives. God, thank you so much for Dustin and our marriage!
Monday, June 27, 2011
Challenge for Purity
June 27, 2011
Yesterday Dustin and I visited a church and the pastor gave a sermon on one of the Beatitudes, the one about those who are pure in heart. After the message, he gave the congregation a challenge to think about the past week and how "pure" we'd been in thought, word, and action. I have to admit that I didn't do too good of a job at the whole purity thing. He also gave us the challenge to ask God to help us to be pursue purity each morning when we get up. After hearing that message, I did focus more on my actions, thoughts, and words. This morning I even thought of that prayer the pastor prompted us to pray. It was certainly convicting to be given that reality check and to have that challenge stay with me through the next day.
I will also admit that my spiritual life has been more or less at a standstill. I've also kind of ignored the convictions to get back in the Bible for study. I keep telling myself that I need to get my homework done or I need to get something else done...or I simply could do it tomorrow, which rarely happens. How am I supposed to continue to grow as a Christian and as a godly wife to my husband without constantly living in the Word? Pretty lame I think. So, that's definitely something I need to actively work on; enough with the passive attitude. Lord, thank you for convicting me of my impurity and my need to get back in the Word. I need Your help to remain diligent in pursuing Your Word constantly. Thank you for being patient with me and thank you for your faithfulness in helping me get back on track.
Yesterday Dustin and I visited a church and the pastor gave a sermon on one of the Beatitudes, the one about those who are pure in heart. After the message, he gave the congregation a challenge to think about the past week and how "pure" we'd been in thought, word, and action. I have to admit that I didn't do too good of a job at the whole purity thing. He also gave us the challenge to ask God to help us to be pursue purity each morning when we get up. After hearing that message, I did focus more on my actions, thoughts, and words. This morning I even thought of that prayer the pastor prompted us to pray. It was certainly convicting to be given that reality check and to have that challenge stay with me through the next day.
I will also admit that my spiritual life has been more or less at a standstill. I've also kind of ignored the convictions to get back in the Bible for study. I keep telling myself that I need to get my homework done or I need to get something else done...or I simply could do it tomorrow, which rarely happens. How am I supposed to continue to grow as a Christian and as a godly wife to my husband without constantly living in the Word? Pretty lame I think. So, that's definitely something I need to actively work on; enough with the passive attitude. Lord, thank you for convicting me of my impurity and my need to get back in the Word. I need Your help to remain diligent in pursuing Your Word constantly. Thank you for being patient with me and thank you for your faithfulness in helping me get back on track.
Saturday, June 25, 2011
Biblical Clarity
June 25, 2011
Yup, it's been a while, blog. Since I'm back, with the gentle bidding from my husband, I'm going to focus on some thoughts I've been dealing with for a while and be somewhat candid in my approach, so bear with me. My parents got a divorce last August and since then my father has been seeing another lady whom he knew from high school. Anyway, they got married yesterday....I didn't attend. I really had some struggles regarding whether or not I should have gone. I took some time to think and pray and talk to Dustin about it. It came down to what the Bible said about such relationships and divorce. On one hand, I did want to honor my father's request to attend but on the other hand my conscience was really bugging me about the "rightness" of it all. I do not want to offend or anger my father in sticking with what I felt was right, but I couldn't bring myself to publicly support the situation.
I'm still learning how to deal with the whole reality of divorce and my father's remarriage. I don't know how to react to it at times. Maybe that's why I'm especially thankful for the clarity of Scripture in times like these. Thank you, Lord, for the purity and clarity of Your word. May I continue to pursue Your truth and may it continue to be a lamp for my feet and a light for my path.
Yup, it's been a while, blog. Since I'm back, with the gentle bidding from my husband, I'm going to focus on some thoughts I've been dealing with for a while and be somewhat candid in my approach, so bear with me. My parents got a divorce last August and since then my father has been seeing another lady whom he knew from high school. Anyway, they got married yesterday....I didn't attend. I really had some struggles regarding whether or not I should have gone. I took some time to think and pray and talk to Dustin about it. It came down to what the Bible said about such relationships and divorce. On one hand, I did want to honor my father's request to attend but on the other hand my conscience was really bugging me about the "rightness" of it all. I do not want to offend or anger my father in sticking with what I felt was right, but I couldn't bring myself to publicly support the situation.
I'm still learning how to deal with the whole reality of divorce and my father's remarriage. I don't know how to react to it at times. Maybe that's why I'm especially thankful for the clarity of Scripture in times like these. Thank you, Lord, for the purity and clarity of Your word. May I continue to pursue Your truth and may it continue to be a lamp for my feet and a light for my path.
Monday, June 6, 2011
Dinners Together
Married life is amazing so far! God has certainly been good to Dustin and I, even through financial issues. We have a roof over our head, a bed, plenty of food, transportation, jobs, and each other. It makes me sad to see couples who have been married for years who can't stand to talk to each other when ordering food or simply carrying on a conversation. It makes me all the more thankful for the fun and love we share as newly-weds, something that I pray and hope doesn't diminish as the years pass. It also makes me thankful for the meals we get to share together. Dustin is already a pretty good cook and we get to share in the fun of preparing our meals. I know we are definitely not going hungry anytime soon with the way he cooks.
Several people have told me that the fun won't last after five years. I wish I had the guts to ask them "why not?" Why shouldn't the fun last after the first five years of marriage? Why did you fall in love in the first place? What was that special something that made you fall head over heels for the man beside you? Why not work at keeping the fun coming and that precious love alive? It's discouraging to hear such remarks, especially after having been married for only three weeks. But then, I remember the sweet older couples with whom Dustin and I learned. One particular couple who were our pre-marriage mentors are still so in love with each other; it's evident in the way they treat each other, look at each other, and put each other before themselves. What a testimony! I hope and pray, and am willing to work for, that our marriage remains strong; even though we may get on each other's nerves, even if we have stupid little arguments, even if times get tough, even after we have kids, may we never forget the reason why we fell in love in the first place. God, bless those who are married and are going through a rough patch in their marriage. I ask that You grant them strength, wisdom, and the selflessness needed to get through. God, I also pray that You continue to strengthen our own marriage, to learn from our mistakes, and to always keep You and each other ahead of ourselves.
Several people have told me that the fun won't last after five years. I wish I had the guts to ask them "why not?" Why shouldn't the fun last after the first five years of marriage? Why did you fall in love in the first place? What was that special something that made you fall head over heels for the man beside you? Why not work at keeping the fun coming and that precious love alive? It's discouraging to hear such remarks, especially after having been married for only three weeks. But then, I remember the sweet older couples with whom Dustin and I learned. One particular couple who were our pre-marriage mentors are still so in love with each other; it's evident in the way they treat each other, look at each other, and put each other before themselves. What a testimony! I hope and pray, and am willing to work for, that our marriage remains strong; even though we may get on each other's nerves, even if we have stupid little arguments, even if times get tough, even after we have kids, may we never forget the reason why we fell in love in the first place. God, bless those who are married and are going through a rough patch in their marriage. I ask that You grant them strength, wisdom, and the selflessness needed to get through. God, I also pray that You continue to strengthen our own marriage, to learn from our mistakes, and to always keep You and each other ahead of ourselves.
Sunday, May 29, 2011
Honeymoon
*I'm giving up on counting how many days I'm on because I want this blog to be more than just another self-appointed assignment. I want it to be enjoyable to myself and to however reads it and I think by simply writing about different days, not the number of that day, will help me stay focused on the true reason for this blog.
I've joked that I would have to get married just to have a day off. Well, it's true! Dustin and I went to Kentucky for our honeymoon and it was the most relaxing time I've had in a few years I think. Even the drive down was a chance to enjoy the changing scenery as the farther south we went; the rolling hills and green fields were everywhere. When we got to our destination, the first thing I noticed was there were two horses standing out in a pasture next to a huge, colonial style home that belonged to our innkeeper. Dustin told me the horses were one of the things that stood out to him when he was choosing lodging options. So, right off the bat, he blew me away with keeping my love for horses in mind when planning the honeymoon.
Our first visit while we were down there was the Mammoth Caves. We've been to a few of Ohio's caves but nothing compares with the immense size of the caves down in Kentucky! We took a two-hour tour, with a group of six-graders, through part of the Caves and were continuously blown away by the sheer volume of each room. It definitely was quite the experience.
The next day he took me to the Corvette Factory in Bowling Green, KY. Who knew that a car factory would be so interesting? We learned so much about what makes a Corvette a Corvette and all the special details that go into making it the modern classic sportscar that it is today. And for being a factory, the employees really seemed to enjoy their job which made the experience more enjoyable than someplace where the employees acted like they would love to be anywhere but there. Dustin did another amazing job on planning that visit. We also had the opportunity to meet Art, a guy who owns a car shop that buys and sells classic cars from the 50's to today's models. He allowed us a free self-guided tour of his shop as well as giving us a souvenir magnet free of charge! We got to chat with him about our honeymoon and a little bit about our faith and it did seem like he had an idea of the Christian faith so that was very encouraging.
Dustin is a huge fan of trains and model railroading so our next stop was the L&N Railpark Museum, home to one of the original trains that used to run on the line from Louisville to Nashville primarily. Dustin could tell you much more about it than I, but it was very interesting and it is part of America's history and was a great influence in the growth in some of the southern states. Our guide took us through the train cars, explaining their importance and some history behind each car. One car, the mail car, had to go through extensive renovation before it was even rail-worthy. The engine itself had just been redone in 2009 and looked like it did in its prime. The museum itself gave more background on the line's history and how certain events tied into the United States' history. I have a better understanding of why Dustin enjoys trains so much, I think.
Our last main event was an upscale dinner out. The location was called 440 Main, a Bayou-style venue with a laid-back atmosphere. Dustin has some good taste! They even gave us a complimentary champagne toast because we were on our honeymoon.
I'm so thankful for my husband and his amazing planning abilities to book our honeymoon. It was certainly a time to remember, of hanging out with my best friend doing everything together, and kicking off married life on a good note. God, thank you so much for Dustin and for a great honeymoon. I will cherish those memories.
I've joked that I would have to get married just to have a day off. Well, it's true! Dustin and I went to Kentucky for our honeymoon and it was the most relaxing time I've had in a few years I think. Even the drive down was a chance to enjoy the changing scenery as the farther south we went; the rolling hills and green fields were everywhere. When we got to our destination, the first thing I noticed was there were two horses standing out in a pasture next to a huge, colonial style home that belonged to our innkeeper. Dustin told me the horses were one of the things that stood out to him when he was choosing lodging options. So, right off the bat, he blew me away with keeping my love for horses in mind when planning the honeymoon.
Our first visit while we were down there was the Mammoth Caves. We've been to a few of Ohio's caves but nothing compares with the immense size of the caves down in Kentucky! We took a two-hour tour, with a group of six-graders, through part of the Caves and were continuously blown away by the sheer volume of each room. It definitely was quite the experience.
The next day he took me to the Corvette Factory in Bowling Green, KY. Who knew that a car factory would be so interesting? We learned so much about what makes a Corvette a Corvette and all the special details that go into making it the modern classic sportscar that it is today. And for being a factory, the employees really seemed to enjoy their job which made the experience more enjoyable than someplace where the employees acted like they would love to be anywhere but there. Dustin did another amazing job on planning that visit. We also had the opportunity to meet Art, a guy who owns a car shop that buys and sells classic cars from the 50's to today's models. He allowed us a free self-guided tour of his shop as well as giving us a souvenir magnet free of charge! We got to chat with him about our honeymoon and a little bit about our faith and it did seem like he had an idea of the Christian faith so that was very encouraging.
Dustin is a huge fan of trains and model railroading so our next stop was the L&N Railpark Museum, home to one of the original trains that used to run on the line from Louisville to Nashville primarily. Dustin could tell you much more about it than I, but it was very interesting and it is part of America's history and was a great influence in the growth in some of the southern states. Our guide took us through the train cars, explaining their importance and some history behind each car. One car, the mail car, had to go through extensive renovation before it was even rail-worthy. The engine itself had just been redone in 2009 and looked like it did in its prime. The museum itself gave more background on the line's history and how certain events tied into the United States' history. I have a better understanding of why Dustin enjoys trains so much, I think.
Our last main event was an upscale dinner out. The location was called 440 Main, a Bayou-style venue with a laid-back atmosphere. Dustin has some good taste! They even gave us a complimentary champagne toast because we were on our honeymoon.
I'm so thankful for my husband and his amazing planning abilities to book our honeymoon. It was certainly a time to remember, of hanging out with my best friend doing everything together, and kicking off married life on a good note. God, thank you so much for Dustin and for a great honeymoon. I will cherish those memories.
Graduation and Wedding Preparation
Time to catch up with my life from the past four weeks. May 9th through the 14th were possibly the busiest two weeks of my life! Getting ready for graduation, visiting with friends one last time, and then finishing wedding details consumed my life for a while. In getting ready for graduation, it never hit me that I would never see some of my friends ever again until after the fact. On the day of graduation, my friends and I went around taking pictures with each other and enjoyed those last few moments together. It really was just a blur of a day, but I do remember hearing my music major friends being called to walk across the stage and I do remember feeling so proud of all of us for completing such rigorous degrees. After the ceremony, my family and then-fiance went out for lunch. It was kind of stressful having all the attention being on me and questions being asked all at the same time. I was very much ready to be done with the gifts and the small talk but I was thankful to spend some time with my family and friends before focusing solely on the wedding.
The week before the wedding was full of planning, hanging out with bridesmaids, and making sure all the last minute decorations were where they needed to be. The rehearsal went smoothly and we all enjoyed a nice meal afterwards. That night, all the bridesmaids and I slept the night in my grandpa's RV. I'm so thankful for those girls and their friendship. The day of the wedding was beautiful! Everything went smoothly, the ceremony and reception were beautiful, and everyone seemed to be happy and enjoying themselves. The only hitch was when my husband's brother, the best man, got too hot in his suit and fainted right beside us while we were starting our vows. He made a recovery and everything continued as it should. I'm glad he was ok and that he was able to complete the ceremony. God is certainly blessed us with a wonderful circle of friends and family who are willing to share that special day with us. Now Dustin and I are happily married and are beginning our life together. Thank you, Lord, for these past two weeks. They have been both a joy and a challenge but I am thankful for every moment of the last two weeks of my single life.
The week before the wedding was full of planning, hanging out with bridesmaids, and making sure all the last minute decorations were where they needed to be. The rehearsal went smoothly and we all enjoyed a nice meal afterwards. That night, all the bridesmaids and I slept the night in my grandpa's RV. I'm so thankful for those girls and their friendship. The day of the wedding was beautiful! Everything went smoothly, the ceremony and reception were beautiful, and everyone seemed to be happy and enjoying themselves. The only hitch was when my husband's brother, the best man, got too hot in his suit and fainted right beside us while we were starting our vows. He made a recovery and everything continued as it should. I'm glad he was ok and that he was able to complete the ceremony. God is certainly blessed us with a wonderful circle of friends and family who are willing to share that special day with us. Now Dustin and I are happily married and are beginning our life together. Thank you, Lord, for these past two weeks. They have been both a joy and a challenge but I am thankful for every moment of the last two weeks of my single life.
Monday, May 2, 2011
Trial runs
Day 103
I met with my Aunt today to talk about the wedding menu then I got to visit an old friend to do a trial run for my wedding up-do. It turned out beautifully! And it was a versatile enough style that my veil could be worn in the back or on top of my head. I'm pretty excited to have her do my hair on the big day.
Wouldn't it be wonderful if we were able to have a trial run for everything in life? Think about it for a moment. Make a pros and cons list of having the ability and time to have a trial run before actually doing something. We could really make a difference in our overall performance at work or at school if we could have a practice shot at our assignment before actually "doing it for real". But on the flipside, how much time would be spent just practicing and running trials? How authentic would our final outcome be if we presented only the "real" deal instead of our first attempt? Something interesting to think about.
As a musician, I have the opportunity to practice to my heart's content. But what if whenever I went in for a lesson, I was performing my first attempt? That wouldn't make for a very productive session in the long run. I think practice and trial runs are appropriate for some things, but not for all. God, thank you for the opportunities available to practice and perfect our performances. But I also thank you for the humbling moments whenever we present our first attempts as our final outcomes.
I met with my Aunt today to talk about the wedding menu then I got to visit an old friend to do a trial run for my wedding up-do. It turned out beautifully! And it was a versatile enough style that my veil could be worn in the back or on top of my head. I'm pretty excited to have her do my hair on the big day.
Wouldn't it be wonderful if we were able to have a trial run for everything in life? Think about it for a moment. Make a pros and cons list of having the ability and time to have a trial run before actually doing something. We could really make a difference in our overall performance at work or at school if we could have a practice shot at our assignment before actually "doing it for real". But on the flipside, how much time would be spent just practicing and running trials? How authentic would our final outcome be if we presented only the "real" deal instead of our first attempt? Something interesting to think about.
As a musician, I have the opportunity to practice to my heart's content. But what if whenever I went in for a lesson, I was performing my first attempt? That wouldn't make for a very productive session in the long run. I think practice and trial runs are appropriate for some things, but not for all. God, thank you for the opportunities available to practice and perfect our performances. But I also thank you for the humbling moments whenever we present our first attempts as our final outcomes.
Easter Sunday
Day 102
Coloring eggs, decorating Easter baskets, eating chocolate and marshmallow peeps. It makes for a wonderful break from reality and the daily routine, but it's also easy to forget the true meaning of Easter, why we celebrate it in the first place. We hear many sermons and lectures on keeping the real meaning of Easter in the front of our minds this time of year, but do we really pay that close attention to the message? I found myself getting caught up in the festivities and only now am I reflecting on how poorly I remembered Easter's purpose.
Christ's rising from the grave is the significance of Easter and the pivotal point in a Christian's life when he accepts Christ as his savior. We build the foundation of our faith on His resurrection. What a shame it is that we place this concept in the back of our minds when the thoughts of getting together with family and coloring eggs come to the forefront. I am challenged, and I challenge you, to keep Christ at the front of my mind during Easter, and keeping Him in remembrance every other day of the year.
Coloring eggs, decorating Easter baskets, eating chocolate and marshmallow peeps. It makes for a wonderful break from reality and the daily routine, but it's also easy to forget the true meaning of Easter, why we celebrate it in the first place. We hear many sermons and lectures on keeping the real meaning of Easter in the front of our minds this time of year, but do we really pay that close attention to the message? I found myself getting caught up in the festivities and only now am I reflecting on how poorly I remembered Easter's purpose.
Christ's rising from the grave is the significance of Easter and the pivotal point in a Christian's life when he accepts Christ as his savior. We build the foundation of our faith on His resurrection. What a shame it is that we place this concept in the back of our minds when the thoughts of getting together with family and coloring eggs come to the forefront. I am challenged, and I challenge you, to keep Christ at the front of my mind during Easter, and keeping Him in remembrance every other day of the year.
Silliness
Day 101
Keriann's 20th birthday was today and to help celebrate, we went with our dad to Hoggy's restaurant. Her friend joined her for the weekend for Easter break and we really had a blast! I haven't laughed so hard in a long time and to laugh with my siblings and new friend, it made it all the more fun. We went to Dad's house afterward and had some fancy birthday cake from a really good bakery. There, we watched Shrek and laughed some more.
Through all this stress this semester, I am very thankful for these rare moments for ultimate silliness and the makings for inside jokes that only friends will share for silly moments to come. I will cherish these moments and look forward to the next time to break loose from life and just be silly. Thank you, Lord, for the wonderful gift of humor and laughter.
Keriann's 20th birthday was today and to help celebrate, we went with our dad to Hoggy's restaurant. Her friend joined her for the weekend for Easter break and we really had a blast! I haven't laughed so hard in a long time and to laugh with my siblings and new friend, it made it all the more fun. We went to Dad's house afterward and had some fancy birthday cake from a really good bakery. There, we watched Shrek and laughed some more.
Through all this stress this semester, I am very thankful for these rare moments for ultimate silliness and the makings for inside jokes that only friends will share for silly moments to come. I will cherish these moments and look forward to the next time to break loose from life and just be silly. Thank you, Lord, for the wonderful gift of humor and laughter.
Wednesday, April 27, 2011
Sanctified Covenants
Day 100
Today one of my close friends got married to her best friend!! What a wedding it turned out to be. Everything was beautifully arranged and the ceremony went without a hitch...except Steph's laughter. I don't think it would have been her wedding if there was no laughing involved. I love to see those two so happy together and it brings me joy to see that they are ready to make such a holy and sanctified covenant with each other as God commands.
Watching her come down the aisle was a wave of emotions. Everyone was either crying, smiling, looking on in awe, or watching Dylan's face as Steph walked toward him. She was a beautiful and radiant bride! I only hope and pray for the best for them. God brought them together and He will keep them together as long as they keep Him in focus. I'm so excited for them!
Today one of my close friends got married to her best friend!! What a wedding it turned out to be. Everything was beautifully arranged and the ceremony went without a hitch...except Steph's laughter. I don't think it would have been her wedding if there was no laughing involved. I love to see those two so happy together and it brings me joy to see that they are ready to make such a holy and sanctified covenant with each other as God commands.
Watching her come down the aisle was a wave of emotions. Everyone was either crying, smiling, looking on in awe, or watching Dylan's face as Steph walked toward him. She was a beautiful and radiant bride! I only hope and pray for the best for them. God brought them together and He will keep them together as long as they keep Him in focus. I'm so excited for them!
Sunday, April 24, 2011
Laughter
Day 99
Steph and Dylan had their wedding rehearsal tonight. I can't believe tomorrow is their special day!! Everything went smoothly...until they rehearsed the vows. I know these two people have laughter as a major part of their relationship and that didn't decrease even during a somewhat serious rehearsal. They started to practice their vows but they kept laughing during the entire time. It was so funny to see them both enjoying themselves so much as they prepared to make their day as smooth as possible. It's a rare moment when those two aren't laughing.
I"m so thankful that they can go through life and still find so many moments for laughter. It is an encouragement that they aren't afraid to laugh and find joy in every situation. I hear wedding planning and rehearsing tends to be stressful, but Steph and Dylan took it all in stride and had so much fun with it! Lord, thank you for this wonderful pair of friends. Please bless them as they prepare for their special day tomorrow.
Steph and Dylan had their wedding rehearsal tonight. I can't believe tomorrow is their special day!! Everything went smoothly...until they rehearsed the vows. I know these two people have laughter as a major part of their relationship and that didn't decrease even during a somewhat serious rehearsal. They started to practice their vows but they kept laughing during the entire time. It was so funny to see them both enjoying themselves so much as they prepared to make their day as smooth as possible. It's a rare moment when those two aren't laughing.
I"m so thankful that they can go through life and still find so many moments for laughter. It is an encouragement that they aren't afraid to laugh and find joy in every situation. I hear wedding planning and rehearsing tends to be stressful, but Steph and Dylan took it all in stride and had so much fun with it! Lord, thank you for this wonderful pair of friends. Please bless them as they prepare for their special day tomorrow.
Wednesday, April 20, 2011
Inexpensive Creativity
Day 98
Our MENC chapter holds seminars about once or twice a month during the semester and tonight we had our last one. Our guest was Dr. Woodson, a world-renowned percussion specialist who does a lot with Remo drum company in creating different drums and equipment for students and young people. He showed us several different examples of all of the drums and simple instruments we could make out of ordinary objects. He made a "talking drum", taken from Africa, with tape, hoops, and pizza sauce cans. We got to turn ordinary straws into flutes and even performed an impromptu piece at the end of the session! You should have seen and heard all of us college kids getting excited over something so simple, yet so creative. This was a huge encouragement to those who are pursuing music education. If our future school district does not have the equipment or the funds for an adequate set of classroom drums and percussion instruments, we now have an idea of how to teach students to make their own. Most of what he made was from recycled objects, wooden blocks, PVC pipe, 40lb fishing line, cans, and tape. I'm pretty sure all of us wanted to go home and make a few of the instruments ourselves. I think that might be a project for me this summer depending on what kind of school district I get into. Or...maybe just for fun if I volunteer at a kid's camp or daycare.
With a pinched budget and as a newly-wed-to-be, I'm really going to be looking for ways to cut corners and to make the most of what I have available. This session definitely gave me great ideas on how to keep the budget within safe boundaries while still having a successful program.
Our MENC chapter holds seminars about once or twice a month during the semester and tonight we had our last one. Our guest was Dr. Woodson, a world-renowned percussion specialist who does a lot with Remo drum company in creating different drums and equipment for students and young people. He showed us several different examples of all of the drums and simple instruments we could make out of ordinary objects. He made a "talking drum", taken from Africa, with tape, hoops, and pizza sauce cans. We got to turn ordinary straws into flutes and even performed an impromptu piece at the end of the session! You should have seen and heard all of us college kids getting excited over something so simple, yet so creative. This was a huge encouragement to those who are pursuing music education. If our future school district does not have the equipment or the funds for an adequate set of classroom drums and percussion instruments, we now have an idea of how to teach students to make their own. Most of what he made was from recycled objects, wooden blocks, PVC pipe, 40lb fishing line, cans, and tape. I'm pretty sure all of us wanted to go home and make a few of the instruments ourselves. I think that might be a project for me this summer depending on what kind of school district I get into. Or...maybe just for fun if I volunteer at a kid's camp or daycare.
With a pinched budget and as a newly-wed-to-be, I'm really going to be looking for ways to cut corners and to make the most of what I have available. This session definitely gave me great ideas on how to keep the budget within safe boundaries while still having a successful program.
Tuesday, April 19, 2011
Good Times Ahead
Day 97
In twenty-five days I will be married to my best friend, a week before that, I will be a college graduate, a few days before that, I will have finished my senior recital and student teaching; about a week before that, one of my roommates will be married. It's been a stressful few days so it's nice to be able to reflect on the good times to come. I've joked around saying that I will have to get married before I ever have any downtime, and so far, that sounds about right. I'm very much looking forward to completing my senior recital, seeing one of my best friends get married, finishing student teaching, graduating, and finally getting married. Then it's off to a few days with Dustin to just chill, hang out, and get ready for married life.
I find it very easy to become distracted and discouraged by the stress in life, by those things that just aren't going the way they are supposed to, so I'm very thankful to have so many things to look forward to. I have my wonderful fiance to lean on, a supportive family, and roommates who are just joy to be with. Thank you, Lord, for the blessings of better times ahead and for keeping me focused on those good things to ward off the discouragement and stress.
In twenty-five days I will be married to my best friend, a week before that, I will be a college graduate, a few days before that, I will have finished my senior recital and student teaching; about a week before that, one of my roommates will be married. It's been a stressful few days so it's nice to be able to reflect on the good times to come. I've joked around saying that I will have to get married before I ever have any downtime, and so far, that sounds about right. I'm very much looking forward to completing my senior recital, seeing one of my best friends get married, finishing student teaching, graduating, and finally getting married. Then it's off to a few days with Dustin to just chill, hang out, and get ready for married life.
I find it very easy to become distracted and discouraged by the stress in life, by those things that just aren't going the way they are supposed to, so I'm very thankful to have so many things to look forward to. I have my wonderful fiance to lean on, a supportive family, and roommates who are just joy to be with. Thank you, Lord, for the blessings of better times ahead and for keeping me focused on those good things to ward off the discouragement and stress.
Monday, April 18, 2011
Improvements
Day 96
I've been working with all the sectionals and band kids for several weeks now. I've gotten to know them and where they are with their talents and skills. There are a select few groups of instruments that are having a harder time grasping concepts than other groups. But today, I realized how far they all have come. Thinking back to the beginning of my student teaching experience, I can remember still going over fingerings and getting the notes familiar to their ears. Today though, the trumpets were reading the notes with more confidence, breathing deeper, and hearing the notes more clearly.
It's always encouraging to see my students improve and develop a love and excitement for reaching the next step in music. I love working with them because they are energetic, fun, and so willing to learn. I'm really going to miss my band kids when student teaching is done.
I've been working with all the sectionals and band kids for several weeks now. I've gotten to know them and where they are with their talents and skills. There are a select few groups of instruments that are having a harder time grasping concepts than other groups. But today, I realized how far they all have come. Thinking back to the beginning of my student teaching experience, I can remember still going over fingerings and getting the notes familiar to their ears. Today though, the trumpets were reading the notes with more confidence, breathing deeper, and hearing the notes more clearly.
It's always encouraging to see my students improve and develop a love and excitement for reaching the next step in music. I love working with them because they are energetic, fun, and so willing to learn. I'm really going to miss my band kids when student teaching is done.
Sunday, April 17, 2011
Four Weeks
Day 95
Today marks the official day that Dustin and I are less than four weeks away from being married! And even less than that and my roommates and I will be graduates! Everything is coming to a screeching halt in the world of college. We will be done with student teaching in less than three weeks, be graduated in just about three weeks, and I will be married in just less than four weeks. Wow, talk about a reality slap in the face. There is so much to do between now and the end of the year. One of my roommates is getting this Friday which just adds to the excitement!
I really don't care to look at calendars for too long; they tend to make me feel stressed if I see too much ink on a particular day...or entire week. That's how it's been this semester. You do not want to see my planner, it's too overwhelming. But yet, all of us, not just me, have made it this far. I'm pretty sure that with God's grace, strength, and never-failing love, we will all make it to the finish line and on to our next chapters of our lives.
Today marks the official day that Dustin and I are less than four weeks away from being married! And even less than that and my roommates and I will be graduates! Everything is coming to a screeching halt in the world of college. We will be done with student teaching in less than three weeks, be graduated in just about three weeks, and I will be married in just less than four weeks. Wow, talk about a reality slap in the face. There is so much to do between now and the end of the year. One of my roommates is getting this Friday which just adds to the excitement!
I really don't care to look at calendars for too long; they tend to make me feel stressed if I see too much ink on a particular day...or entire week. That's how it's been this semester. You do not want to see my planner, it's too overwhelming. But yet, all of us, not just me, have made it this far. I'm pretty sure that with God's grace, strength, and never-failing love, we will all make it to the finish line and on to our next chapters of our lives.
Saturday, April 16, 2011
Busy Days
Day 94
Saturdays are traditionally meant for relaxing and taking it easy. I don't think I've had one of those in quite some time. Today was no exception. I had a dress fitting in the morning, a bridal shower in the afternoon, and a formal banquet in the evening. I don't mind busy days but this one was one for the books. The dress fitting was fun and my sister and I were able to visit our aunt while we were being fitted; the bridal shower brought together friends, family, and future family together to have fun, celebrate Dustin's and my wedding, and enjoy delicious food.
The banquet, however, was a different story. It was held in Cincinnati, two hours away from where the bridal party was held, so Dustin picked me up from the bridal shower and we headed towards the south. First off, we ended up leaving the shower late because of the clean-up and good-byes, then I forgot to print off directions so we had to call up some of my friends and get directions from them. After that, we finally found the location only to find out that there was a fee for parking...with only exact change. So we had to borrow money from another friend of mine (she was a life saver!). Walking up to the entrance, Dustin forgot to change into his dress shoes and had to run back to the car to change quickly while I waited at the main entrance. Once inside, though, we arrived just in time for dinner to be served and we finally were able to enjoy an evening together with friends, good food, music, and great conversations.
Now that I'm home, I feel like I could plop over onto my laptop right now and fall sound asleep. Today was jam-packed with things to do and places to be, but it was so worth it. I was able to visit with friends and family as well as hit the town with Dustin. Busyness is the story of my life, but it's days like this that make me thankful for them.
Saturdays are traditionally meant for relaxing and taking it easy. I don't think I've had one of those in quite some time. Today was no exception. I had a dress fitting in the morning, a bridal shower in the afternoon, and a formal banquet in the evening. I don't mind busy days but this one was one for the books. The dress fitting was fun and my sister and I were able to visit our aunt while we were being fitted; the bridal shower brought together friends, family, and future family together to have fun, celebrate Dustin's and my wedding, and enjoy delicious food.
The banquet, however, was a different story. It was held in Cincinnati, two hours away from where the bridal party was held, so Dustin picked me up from the bridal shower and we headed towards the south. First off, we ended up leaving the shower late because of the clean-up and good-byes, then I forgot to print off directions so we had to call up some of my friends and get directions from them. After that, we finally found the location only to find out that there was a fee for parking...with only exact change. So we had to borrow money from another friend of mine (she was a life saver!). Walking up to the entrance, Dustin forgot to change into his dress shoes and had to run back to the car to change quickly while I waited at the main entrance. Once inside, though, we arrived just in time for dinner to be served and we finally were able to enjoy an evening together with friends, good food, music, and great conversations.
Now that I'm home, I feel like I could plop over onto my laptop right now and fall sound asleep. Today was jam-packed with things to do and places to be, but it was so worth it. I was able to visit with friends and family as well as hit the town with Dustin. Busyness is the story of my life, but it's days like this that make me thankful for them.
Friday, April 15, 2011
Senior Moments
Day 93
One of our professors from two years ago invited us senior music majors over for an end-of-the-year dinner at her house. She has always invited us over when she taught us. Her culinary skills are always amazing and we always leave stuffed. I'm so thankful for her kindness, cooking, and care for us students. She has always shown a sincere interest in our success and our lives in general. I know that those of us who are graduating will miss her.
One of our professors from two years ago invited us senior music majors over for an end-of-the-year dinner at her house. She has always invited us over when she taught us. Her culinary skills are always amazing and we always leave stuffed. I'm so thankful for her kindness, cooking, and care for us students. She has always shown a sincere interest in our success and our lives in general. I know that those of us who are graduating will miss her.
Thursday, April 14, 2011
Signs of Summer
Day 92
Boy am I ready for summer to get here! The beautiful warm weather, the windows down in my car and the radio blasting my favorite Journey songs. Heck, I even painted my nails! It's a great feeling to know that the school year is weeks from being done, which marks the end of my time at Cedarville and with my kids that I teach during student teaching. I really am going to miss them because they gave me such a great experience and helped me to grow as a teacher and as a person. My cooperating teacher has also given me much to think about as I look forward to greeting my own class in the future. She definitely has a heart for her students and she does all she can to help them learn and enjoy music.
Summer also means the beginning of married life, looking for summer jobs and sending out resumes to prospective school districts, living someplace new, and learning the ins and outs of the "real world". I think I'm ready for it. God has brought me this far so I'm sure He will guide me the rest of the way. I'm so thankful for so many signs of summer!
Boy am I ready for summer to get here! The beautiful warm weather, the windows down in my car and the radio blasting my favorite Journey songs. Heck, I even painted my nails! It's a great feeling to know that the school year is weeks from being done, which marks the end of my time at Cedarville and with my kids that I teach during student teaching. I really am going to miss them because they gave me such a great experience and helped me to grow as a teacher and as a person. My cooperating teacher has also given me much to think about as I look forward to greeting my own class in the future. She definitely has a heart for her students and she does all she can to help them learn and enjoy music.
Summer also means the beginning of married life, looking for summer jobs and sending out resumes to prospective school districts, living someplace new, and learning the ins and outs of the "real world". I think I'm ready for it. God has brought me this far so I'm sure He will guide me the rest of the way. I'm so thankful for so many signs of summer!
Wednesday, April 13, 2011
Music Ed. Majors
Day 91
The MENC organization hosted a farewell party for the graduating music education seniors this evening. We had pizza from the local pizza shop, cookies, brownies, cupcakes, pop, and all kinds of good, sugary stuff. We got to sit in the sun outside of the music department building and enjoy our food and each other's fellowship. The seniors were prompted to take a scavenger hunt that led all four of us to a framed photo collage of pictures of all five of us seniors, including the one who just finished his overseas student teaching. It was so sweet of the group to do that for us! We got to swap stories of each of the seniors, both sentimental and funny, then our adviser had us all sit in front of all the other students and she presented to each of us a music bag filled with various teaching materials! We each got notebooks, stickers pads, award cards, water bottles, bulletin board boarders, and a music koosh (an insider's teaching tool that only the music educators knew about because of our adviser). I don't think I've ever felt so blessed by the music department and the music educator chapter especially. They all made us feel good about our four years of busyness as well as encouraged us as we enter the real world soon. I really appreciate those people and our adviser who invested so much time and effort into us in getting us ready to go out into the field of teaching music. I will forever be indebted to that group and the great memories we've all made.
The MENC organization hosted a farewell party for the graduating music education seniors this evening. We had pizza from the local pizza shop, cookies, brownies, cupcakes, pop, and all kinds of good, sugary stuff. We got to sit in the sun outside of the music department building and enjoy our food and each other's fellowship. The seniors were prompted to take a scavenger hunt that led all four of us to a framed photo collage of pictures of all five of us seniors, including the one who just finished his overseas student teaching. It was so sweet of the group to do that for us! We got to swap stories of each of the seniors, both sentimental and funny, then our adviser had us all sit in front of all the other students and she presented to each of us a music bag filled with various teaching materials! We each got notebooks, stickers pads, award cards, water bottles, bulletin board boarders, and a music koosh (an insider's teaching tool that only the music educators knew about because of our adviser). I don't think I've ever felt so blessed by the music department and the music educator chapter especially. They all made us feel good about our four years of busyness as well as encouraged us as we enter the real world soon. I really appreciate those people and our adviser who invested so much time and effort into us in getting us ready to go out into the field of teaching music. I will forever be indebted to that group and the great memories we've all made.
Tuesday, April 12, 2011
Different Languages
Day 90
It's interesting to think that the Tower of Babel incident was sort of like a curse yet God used it for good. If it weren't for the issue of people's selfishness, God wouldn't have had to mix up the languages. I was shopping at Kroger's recently for basic groceries and a Spanish-speaking gentleman came up to me asking about a package of meat. I had taken three years of French in high school and the only thing I've used it for is to order food from an authentic French cafe. As I tried to understand what he was asking me, I felt awkward and sad that I wasn't able to understand him or help him with what he needed. He eventually mumbled, "I no speak good English" which was very true. But hey, I no speak good Spanish...or any Spanish for that matter. I told him it was okay and that I was sorry I couldn't have helped him better. But as I left, I had the sudden urge to teach myself Spanish just so I could better communicate to those living around me, especially in the town where I'm living as I finish college. Had I known enough Spanish to help him, he would have probably felt thankful that someone knew Spanish and I wouldn't have felt so bad about not being able to help him.
I still think I'm going to start teaching myself basic Spanish. It wouldn't hurt, just like knowing the basics of French hasn't hurt yet. I want to be a better communicator and a better witness to those around me, and I know language doesn't have to be a barrier, but wouldn't it help if I took the time to learn a little bit of their language? God, thank you for that gentleman at Kroger and thank you for that humbling moment when I couldn't understand him even enough to help him. Please use me in whatever fashion You deem necessary for Your glory and the spreading of Your Word, even if it takes a little bit of effort to learn some Spanish.
It's interesting to think that the Tower of Babel incident was sort of like a curse yet God used it for good. If it weren't for the issue of people's selfishness, God wouldn't have had to mix up the languages. I was shopping at Kroger's recently for basic groceries and a Spanish-speaking gentleman came up to me asking about a package of meat. I had taken three years of French in high school and the only thing I've used it for is to order food from an authentic French cafe. As I tried to understand what he was asking me, I felt awkward and sad that I wasn't able to understand him or help him with what he needed. He eventually mumbled, "I no speak good English" which was very true. But hey, I no speak good Spanish...or any Spanish for that matter. I told him it was okay and that I was sorry I couldn't have helped him better. But as I left, I had the sudden urge to teach myself Spanish just so I could better communicate to those living around me, especially in the town where I'm living as I finish college. Had I known enough Spanish to help him, he would have probably felt thankful that someone knew Spanish and I wouldn't have felt so bad about not being able to help him.
I still think I'm going to start teaching myself basic Spanish. It wouldn't hurt, just like knowing the basics of French hasn't hurt yet. I want to be a better communicator and a better witness to those around me, and I know language doesn't have to be a barrier, but wouldn't it help if I took the time to learn a little bit of their language? God, thank you for that gentleman at Kroger and thank you for that humbling moment when I couldn't understand him even enough to help him. Please use me in whatever fashion You deem necessary for Your glory and the spreading of Your Word, even if it takes a little bit of effort to learn some Spanish.
Monday, April 11, 2011
Passing the Recital Check
Day 89
I know no greater relief from today other than passing my recital check! What a weight off of my shoulders and what a testimony to God's provision and strength. He gave me the confidence I needed to be sure I could get through all the music and He didn't let any thoughts get the better of me. My professor tells me I am my own worst enemy when it comes to performing because I subconsciously tell myself that I won't be able to make it, I won't be able to hit the high notes or take in as big a breath as I need to. Today, though, I focused on consistent breathing, taking in bigger breaths, and remembering to take my time between movements and pieces.
I finally feel like I'm where I need to be as a trumpet player. I have struggled with thoughts of not being good enough for the music department and not always meeting my professor's or my standards. Today, I feel like it was the affirmation I needed to let me know that I am where God wants me to be, in the busiest part of my life, playing my best for His glory.
I know no greater relief from today other than passing my recital check! What a weight off of my shoulders and what a testimony to God's provision and strength. He gave me the confidence I needed to be sure I could get through all the music and He didn't let any thoughts get the better of me. My professor tells me I am my own worst enemy when it comes to performing because I subconsciously tell myself that I won't be able to make it, I won't be able to hit the high notes or take in as big a breath as I need to. Today, though, I focused on consistent breathing, taking in bigger breaths, and remembering to take my time between movements and pieces.
I finally feel like I'm where I need to be as a trumpet player. I have struggled with thoughts of not being good enough for the music department and not always meeting my professor's or my standards. Today, I feel like it was the affirmation I needed to let me know that I am where God wants me to be, in the busiest part of my life, playing my best for His glory.
Sunday, April 10, 2011
Reliance
Day 88
Reliance on a machine to get me from home to my apartment; reliance on my chops to get me through three pieces of solo music; reliance on a computer to not crash while writing lesson plans; reliance on God to get me through each day.
I never really stopped to think about how much I rely on different people and things to survive. I so often think that I'm doing this all on my own, but I'm really not, although it may feel like it sometimes. Tomorrow is my recital check and I am pretty much prepared for it. I had a decent practice session tonight and now all I have to get over is my nerves. Unfortunately, I didn't pass my first recital check because my nerves got the better of me and I got dry mouth really bad. I have an issue with stage fright so I'm heavily relying on what I've learned, my improved endurance, and God's strength to get me through it. I have never felt this confident about performing so I think tomorrow will be a demonstration of trust, dutiful practice paying off, and reliance on God that I will do my best.
I wouldn't mind any prayers for tomorrow, so if you get a few seconds, please remember me and pray for total reliance on God who gives me strength and the power to overcome anything, even nerves.
Reliance on a machine to get me from home to my apartment; reliance on my chops to get me through three pieces of solo music; reliance on a computer to not crash while writing lesson plans; reliance on God to get me through each day.
I never really stopped to think about how much I rely on different people and things to survive. I so often think that I'm doing this all on my own, but I'm really not, although it may feel like it sometimes. Tomorrow is my recital check and I am pretty much prepared for it. I had a decent practice session tonight and now all I have to get over is my nerves. Unfortunately, I didn't pass my first recital check because my nerves got the better of me and I got dry mouth really bad. I have an issue with stage fright so I'm heavily relying on what I've learned, my improved endurance, and God's strength to get me through it. I have never felt this confident about performing so I think tomorrow will be a demonstration of trust, dutiful practice paying off, and reliance on God that I will do my best.
I wouldn't mind any prayers for tomorrow, so if you get a few seconds, please remember me and pray for total reliance on God who gives me strength and the power to overcome anything, even nerves.
Saturday, April 9, 2011
Legacy
Day 87
My brother played a major role in his high school production of "Into the Woods" as Jack. He did an awesome job as did the rest of the cast. I was thoroughly pleased and entertained by the choice of cast members and the cohesion of everyone involved. At the end of the production, the retiring music director of the high school was recognized for her many years of dedication to the Elgin community and to the music department and its students. Every year she manages choirs, the famous show choir, Spring musicals, competitions, etc. As a music teacher in training, I don't know how she handles it year after year but, of course, she has had years of experience and trial and error. Whoever fills her spot next year will have a huge pair of shoes to fill and a lot of people to impress and keep happy with whatever they decide to bring to the music program. My only hope is that they will do as close a good job as she did as they can.
She has inspired me in so many ways as a music teacher. I commend her responsibilities and her commitment to the program and the students. She really sacrificed a lot to keep music thriving at the school. I can only hope to leave a similar legacy when it comes time for me to retire. She will be sorely missed and very much respected; something every music teacher should aspire to be.
My brother played a major role in his high school production of "Into the Woods" as Jack. He did an awesome job as did the rest of the cast. I was thoroughly pleased and entertained by the choice of cast members and the cohesion of everyone involved. At the end of the production, the retiring music director of the high school was recognized for her many years of dedication to the Elgin community and to the music department and its students. Every year she manages choirs, the famous show choir, Spring musicals, competitions, etc. As a music teacher in training, I don't know how she handles it year after year but, of course, she has had years of experience and trial and error. Whoever fills her spot next year will have a huge pair of shoes to fill and a lot of people to impress and keep happy with whatever they decide to bring to the music program. My only hope is that they will do as close a good job as she did as they can.
She has inspired me in so many ways as a music teacher. I commend her responsibilities and her commitment to the program and the students. She really sacrificed a lot to keep music thriving at the school. I can only hope to leave a similar legacy when it comes time for me to retire. She will be sorely missed and very much respected; something every music teacher should aspire to be.
Legal Documents
Day 86
This is probably one of the only times I will admit to being thankful for a legal document. Apart from seeing Dustin for the second day in a row, we got to purchase our marriage license! Wow, what an experience. We found our way to the correct office and sat down at the front desk. The lady who helped us told us to raise our right hands and say an oath; very similar to the oath said when a witness comes to the witness stand during a trial. It immediately put a serious tone to the whole procedure. We gave our information, our parents' information, and signed the release document. We even saw the process of placing the seal of Ohio on the license! Pretty cool if you ask me. After about ten or fifteen minutes, it was official and we got to walk out with our license and all the necessary paperwork to give to our officiating pastor. Yet another thing accomplished for the wedding! Yes, thanks God for such an important and meaningful legal document.
This is probably one of the only times I will admit to being thankful for a legal document. Apart from seeing Dustin for the second day in a row, we got to purchase our marriage license! Wow, what an experience. We found our way to the correct office and sat down at the front desk. The lady who helped us told us to raise our right hands and say an oath; very similar to the oath said when a witness comes to the witness stand during a trial. It immediately put a serious tone to the whole procedure. We gave our information, our parents' information, and signed the release document. We even saw the process of placing the seal of Ohio on the license! Pretty cool if you ask me. After about ten or fifteen minutes, it was official and we got to walk out with our license and all the necessary paperwork to give to our officiating pastor. Yet another thing accomplished for the wedding! Yes, thanks God for such an important and meaningful legal document.
Grandpa and Grandma Arnott
Day 85
Dustin and I went to Columbus early this morning to get an idea of how the cake setup will look like for the wedding. I had asked my Grandma Arnott to make the cake and she made a beautiful sample cake for my birthday. She's teaching herself along with an informal cake-decorating class she attends with some friends. Today we got to decide on the arrangement, finalize the shade of white frosting to match my dress more accurately, and purchase boxes and necessary accessories.
She took me aside for a little bit and showed me the diamond she offered for me to wear for the wedding. It was her grandmother's diamond in a simple yet elegant setting on a white gold chain. It matched my dress perfectly and I agreed to let it be my "something old". We got to chat about getting ready for marriage and let reality sink in for a few seconds. I'm so excited about planning the wedding and marrying my best friend.
It was so good to get to visit with the both of them since I don't get to go to Columbus very often. It was even better to get their help in the planning along with Dustin. I'm so thankful for their support and willingness to help.
Dustin and I went to Columbus early this morning to get an idea of how the cake setup will look like for the wedding. I had asked my Grandma Arnott to make the cake and she made a beautiful sample cake for my birthday. She's teaching herself along with an informal cake-decorating class she attends with some friends. Today we got to decide on the arrangement, finalize the shade of white frosting to match my dress more accurately, and purchase boxes and necessary accessories.
She took me aside for a little bit and showed me the diamond she offered for me to wear for the wedding. It was her grandmother's diamond in a simple yet elegant setting on a white gold chain. It matched my dress perfectly and I agreed to let it be my "something old". We got to chat about getting ready for marriage and let reality sink in for a few seconds. I'm so excited about planning the wedding and marrying my best friend.
It was so good to get to visit with the both of them since I don't get to go to Columbus very often. It was even better to get their help in the planning along with Dustin. I'm so thankful for their support and willingness to help.
Discipline
Day 84
It's hard to find the motivation to get school stuff done on Spring break but it has to be done. I'm thankful for the opportunity that I had today to get a lot of things done that had to do with student teaching, online classes, and practicing. It felt good to get some stuff accomplished so I didn't have to worry about it after work.
While I clean the kitchen at work, I have to remember to try and focus on the job at hand while not getting distracted by other duties that my coworkers could handle. I usually can get into a mindset that lets me drift to other topics while still scrubbing or scraping away. I'm thankful for the patience that God has blessed me with. It definitely helps when it comes to getting a menial job done.
It's hard to find the motivation to get school stuff done on Spring break but it has to be done. I'm thankful for the opportunity that I had today to get a lot of things done that had to do with student teaching, online classes, and practicing. It felt good to get some stuff accomplished so I didn't have to worry about it after work.
While I clean the kitchen at work, I have to remember to try and focus on the job at hand while not getting distracted by other duties that my coworkers could handle. I usually can get into a mindset that lets me drift to other topics while still scrubbing or scraping away. I'm thankful for the patience that God has blessed me with. It definitely helps when it comes to getting a menial job done.
Friday, April 8, 2011
Confidence
Day 83
A week away from my recital check and I finally am able to practice with my accompanist. It went well, to my surprise. My accompanist is very talented and he basically sight-read the music while I played. After the session, my professor was very impressed and told me I should be very encouraged by the performance. I felt so confident and much less worried when I played along with the accompanist. It was refreshing to know that I'm on the right track and that I can play through both of my hardest pieces without losing my chops. I'm aiming to hang on to that confidence and praying that I will do wonderfully on my check. Yes, God is good.
A week away from my recital check and I finally am able to practice with my accompanist. It went well, to my surprise. My accompanist is very talented and he basically sight-read the music while I played. After the session, my professor was very impressed and told me I should be very encouraged by the performance. I felt so confident and much less worried when I played along with the accompanist. It was refreshing to know that I'm on the right track and that I can play through both of my hardest pieces without losing my chops. I'm aiming to hang on to that confidence and praying that I will do wonderfully on my check. Yes, God is good.
Calming Peace
Day 82
Working on my education portfolio is kind of stressful when you work on it a day before and the day of. When I went in for my meeting to make sure I was on the right track with the portfolio, my professor made it clear of how important this could be when looking and applying for jobs. I learned a lot from what she said. There were certain things employers will look for and doing the portfolio will give me a good idea of how I measure up to whoever else is on the market for the same job as I.
One thing stood out to me as I left her office: She had made it very clear how important the portfolio was but she was concerned about my progress because the completed portfolio is due in three weeks. Are you kidding me? Three weeks? That's nothing compared to what I've been handling all semester. I've been planning a wedding, keeping up with private lessons, online classes, and student teaching, as well as prepare for my senior recital all at once! If I have three weeks to work on the portfolio, it's going to be one heck of a portfolio. It was calming, in a humorous way, that I had so much time to work on it. I'm really thankful for that instance of calming peace in the middle of all I've had to deal with thus far. Thank you, God, for getting me to this point and helping me handle life with you by my side.
Working on my education portfolio is kind of stressful when you work on it a day before and the day of. When I went in for my meeting to make sure I was on the right track with the portfolio, my professor made it clear of how important this could be when looking and applying for jobs. I learned a lot from what she said. There were certain things employers will look for and doing the portfolio will give me a good idea of how I measure up to whoever else is on the market for the same job as I.
One thing stood out to me as I left her office: She had made it very clear how important the portfolio was but she was concerned about my progress because the completed portfolio is due in three weeks. Are you kidding me? Three weeks? That's nothing compared to what I've been handling all semester. I've been planning a wedding, keeping up with private lessons, online classes, and student teaching, as well as prepare for my senior recital all at once! If I have three weeks to work on the portfolio, it's going to be one heck of a portfolio. It was calming, in a humorous way, that I had so much time to work on it. I'm really thankful for that instance of calming peace in the middle of all I've had to deal with thus far. Thank you, God, for getting me to this point and helping me handle life with you by my side.
Thursday, April 7, 2011
Family
Day 81
Being home has made me realize how much I appreciate my family and how much I'm going to miss seeing them so often once I'm married. Today I got to work with my mom, brother, and sister at the family pizza shop! My brother stocked, my mom ran the cash register, and my sister and I ran the kitchen. It's always much more enjoyable and fun when all of us work at the same time. I was able to spend some time with my sister while she was here for the day, share similar humor with my brother, and talk to mom about wedding stuff.
I have already bragged on all of my family but I can't get over the fact that we are all so different and yet so alike at the same time. I love that about us. We've stuck together and have grown closer together, for the most part, since our parents' divorce and I wouldn't trade time with my siblings for anything. I'm especially thankful for these two weeks off so I can have the chance to spend at least some time with Mom, Kyle, and Keriann. It's funny to realize how much you miss someone when you come back for a visit. I'm still working on wrapping my mind around the fact that all of my time with my immediate family will now be spent in visits. From here on out, I will no longer be permanently living at my Mom's house; I have an apartment with two other girls right now and I will be moving in with my fiance once we're married. Wow. This must be the week for reality checks. I'm so thankful for my family and the chances I get to spend with them.
Being home has made me realize how much I appreciate my family and how much I'm going to miss seeing them so often once I'm married. Today I got to work with my mom, brother, and sister at the family pizza shop! My brother stocked, my mom ran the cash register, and my sister and I ran the kitchen. It's always much more enjoyable and fun when all of us work at the same time. I was able to spend some time with my sister while she was here for the day, share similar humor with my brother, and talk to mom about wedding stuff.
I have already bragged on all of my family but I can't get over the fact that we are all so different and yet so alike at the same time. I love that about us. We've stuck together and have grown closer together, for the most part, since our parents' divorce and I wouldn't trade time with my siblings for anything. I'm especially thankful for these two weeks off so I can have the chance to spend at least some time with Mom, Kyle, and Keriann. It's funny to realize how much you miss someone when you come back for a visit. I'm still working on wrapping my mind around the fact that all of my time with my immediate family will now be spent in visits. From here on out, I will no longer be permanently living at my Mom's house; I have an apartment with two other girls right now and I will be moving in with my fiance once we're married. Wow. This must be the week for reality checks. I'm so thankful for my family and the chances I get to spend with them.
Confirmation
Day 80
Breakfast at Bob Evans? Yes, please! Dustin and I had breakfast with our officiating pastor today to talk about our relationship and where we are as we prepare for getting married. We were both asked to fill out an "inventory" of our relationship: things we had going for us, things we've had to work through, and something we still felt that we needed to work on as we prepare for marriage. We each filled one out separately then read them while we sat and ate. The funny thing was that our answers turned out to be similar in nature and we both had something unique that we wanted to continue to work on.
When all was said and done, the pastor, who had become a good friend to us, said he saw promise in our relationship. He made it clear that he didn't want us to feel like our marriage was going to be a bed of roses, but he was very encouraged through our different answers at the depth and closeness of our relationship. Dustin and I had been good friends before we ever got serious and we have always made it a point to be biblically founded in God's Word and in prayer. It was very encouraging to hear that from him, seeing how both of Dustin's and my parents are split. I do pray that our relationship and marriage may be a testimony to something greater than ourselves, a breath of fresh air and a positive change of pace from the history of our families. I'm really looking forward to growing with Dustin and continuing to build our foundation of faith while we prepare to start our life together.
Breakfast at Bob Evans? Yes, please! Dustin and I had breakfast with our officiating pastor today to talk about our relationship and where we are as we prepare for getting married. We were both asked to fill out an "inventory" of our relationship: things we had going for us, things we've had to work through, and something we still felt that we needed to work on as we prepare for marriage. We each filled one out separately then read them while we sat and ate. The funny thing was that our answers turned out to be similar in nature and we both had something unique that we wanted to continue to work on.
When all was said and done, the pastor, who had become a good friend to us, said he saw promise in our relationship. He made it clear that he didn't want us to feel like our marriage was going to be a bed of roses, but he was very encouraged through our different answers at the depth and closeness of our relationship. Dustin and I had been good friends before we ever got serious and we have always made it a point to be biblically founded in God's Word and in prayer. It was very encouraging to hear that from him, seeing how both of Dustin's and my parents are split. I do pray that our relationship and marriage may be a testimony to something greater than ourselves, a breath of fresh air and a positive change of pace from the history of our families. I'm really looking forward to growing with Dustin and continuing to build our foundation of faith while we prepare to start our life together.
Sister
Day 79
It's April 1st a.k.a. April Fool's Day as everyone knows. I got on Facebook to check on some things and noticed that several people had commented on my sister's picture. It was a photo of her hand with a simple, elegant ring on her ring finger. Relatives had commented on the photo with concerned remarks pertaining to if the engagement was real. At first, I was caught off-guard but then I remembered the date and realized it was a well-planned April Fool's joke. Very well played, I should add. She and her boyfriend both changed their relationship status and had many friends fooled. There were several comments of congratulations and well-wishes. Definitely one for the books.
I love my sister. We have been close for as long as I can remember. Yeah, we have had our spats and unfriendly moments but that's what sisters do. She is one of my closest friends even though we are pretty much complete opposites; she likes fashion and enjoys drama while I prefer comfort and laid back atmospheres. But we always are there for each other. She is now my Maid of Honor. No one else could ever be as deserving of that role as she is. Thank you, Lord, for such a wonderful friend and sister as Keriann. Bless her and continue to grow her into a woman after Your own heart.
It's April 1st a.k.a. April Fool's Day as everyone knows. I got on Facebook to check on some things and noticed that several people had commented on my sister's picture. It was a photo of her hand with a simple, elegant ring on her ring finger. Relatives had commented on the photo with concerned remarks pertaining to if the engagement was real. At first, I was caught off-guard but then I remembered the date and realized it was a well-planned April Fool's joke. Very well played, I should add. She and her boyfriend both changed their relationship status and had many friends fooled. There were several comments of congratulations and well-wishes. Definitely one for the books.
I love my sister. We have been close for as long as I can remember. Yeah, we have had our spats and unfriendly moments but that's what sisters do. She is one of my closest friends even though we are pretty much complete opposites; she likes fashion and enjoys drama while I prefer comfort and laid back atmospheres. But we always are there for each other. She is now my Maid of Honor. No one else could ever be as deserving of that role as she is. Thank you, Lord, for such a wonderful friend and sister as Keriann. Bless her and continue to grow her into a woman after Your own heart.
Tuesday, April 5, 2011
Abbott and Costello
Day 78
Ah, wedding planning...and hilarious black and white comedies. Dustin came over today to help get some more wedding stuff done including our scrapbook and finalizing the video person contract. We turned on the television for background noise and there was a Abbott and Costello marathon going on one of the local channels. I remember watching their famous routine "Who's on First" in high school during a free day in history class. The antics in that routine were only double the fun in their features included in the marathon: going to Venus, meeting Frankenstein, meeting the Mummy, and all kinds of silly plots that only they could pull off.
Isn't it sad that the humor today has to consist of nudity, foul language, and rude jokes? We watched the marathon while laughing hard. It was clean, cheesy, honestly funny, and had none of the rude, crude nonsense found in today's comedy routines such as Saturday Night Live and The Office. Yes, the world is not going to get any better and humanity is still sinful; it's a tragedy that the media feels the need to resort to such raunchiness to get an audience. I think we were both grateful for the breath of fresh air that Abbott and Costello provided for us in their comedies.
Ah, wedding planning...and hilarious black and white comedies. Dustin came over today to help get some more wedding stuff done including our scrapbook and finalizing the video person contract. We turned on the television for background noise and there was a Abbott and Costello marathon going on one of the local channels. I remember watching their famous routine "Who's on First" in high school during a free day in history class. The antics in that routine were only double the fun in their features included in the marathon: going to Venus, meeting Frankenstein, meeting the Mummy, and all kinds of silly plots that only they could pull off.
Isn't it sad that the humor today has to consist of nudity, foul language, and rude jokes? We watched the marathon while laughing hard. It was clean, cheesy, honestly funny, and had none of the rude, crude nonsense found in today's comedy routines such as Saturday Night Live and The Office. Yes, the world is not going to get any better and humanity is still sinful; it's a tragedy that the media feels the need to resort to such raunchiness to get an audience. I think we were both grateful for the breath of fresh air that Abbott and Costello provided for us in their comedies.
Accompanist
Day 77
After yesterday, today was definitely a gift from God. The gentleman I had asked to be my accompanist replied to my email confirming that he would accompany me for my recital! His rates were reasonable and he is very talented. I couldn't have been happier. After asking several university students and dreading the possibility of paying hundreds of dollars on a professional accompanist, he was definitely a God send. I will be forever thankful for his sacrifice of time and willingness to use his talents with me for the recital. With the check being less than two weeks away, there's no way I could have pulled through otherwise.
I made a list of things to get done today and I got most of it done which also lifted some weight off of my shoulders and mind. But getting an accompanist secured in time for the recital check and the recital itself was a huge accomplishment. Thank you, Lord, for showing Your might and Sovereignty to me today by providing such a huge answer to prayer.
After yesterday, today was definitely a gift from God. The gentleman I had asked to be my accompanist replied to my email confirming that he would accompany me for my recital! His rates were reasonable and he is very talented. I couldn't have been happier. After asking several university students and dreading the possibility of paying hundreds of dollars on a professional accompanist, he was definitely a God send. I will be forever thankful for his sacrifice of time and willingness to use his talents with me for the recital. With the check being less than two weeks away, there's no way I could have pulled through otherwise.
I made a list of things to get done today and I got most of it done which also lifted some weight off of my shoulders and mind. But getting an accompanist secured in time for the recital check and the recital itself was a huge accomplishment. Thank you, Lord, for showing Your might and Sovereignty to me today by providing such a huge answer to prayer.
Heart to Hearts
Day 76
Wow, I cannot express how emotional today has been. I went to campus for a trumpet lesson and to get some paperwork stuff completed. I was reminded how close my recital check was and that I still desperately need an accompanist. After work, I cried all the way home and ended up sitting in the driveway for a good ten minutes bawling like a baby. I've never felt so overwhelmed. It was hard to even talk to my fiance about what was going on. Eventually, as I sat in the driveway, I started praying and I gave all my issues and worries to God. That sounds so cliche but it was so relieving to hand my problems over to someone else. I know He will take care of the accompanist, the finances, the paperwork, the student teaching, and everything else that was weighing on my mind. After that I was able to better articulate my feelings to my best friend. I'm so thankful for a loving God who is always there, even when I've ignored Him and haven't given Him the proper attention. I'm praying for a better day tomorrow, but more importantly, a day in which I am constantly aware of His goodness and provision.
Wow, I cannot express how emotional today has been. I went to campus for a trumpet lesson and to get some paperwork stuff completed. I was reminded how close my recital check was and that I still desperately need an accompanist. After work, I cried all the way home and ended up sitting in the driveway for a good ten minutes bawling like a baby. I've never felt so overwhelmed. It was hard to even talk to my fiance about what was going on. Eventually, as I sat in the driveway, I started praying and I gave all my issues and worries to God. That sounds so cliche but it was so relieving to hand my problems over to someone else. I know He will take care of the accompanist, the finances, the paperwork, the student teaching, and everything else that was weighing on my mind. After that I was able to better articulate my feelings to my best friend. I'm so thankful for a loving God who is always there, even when I've ignored Him and haven't given Him the proper attention. I'm praying for a better day tomorrow, but more importantly, a day in which I am constantly aware of His goodness and provision.
Monday, April 4, 2011
Responsibility
Day 75
Part of working in the food industry requires clean facilities. Our family-owned pizza shop was due for a good Spring cleaning and guess who was put in charge of the heavy scrubbing while she is home for Spring break...me. My grandpa told me that I could be trusted to do a good job of it. So, today I started scrubbing the sides of the deep fryer, the oven, and a shelving unit. I forgot how much I enjoy hard, dirty work. If only I had more time to just clean instead of balancing that time with cooking.
I guess it feels good to be held responsible in this sort of case. It is motivation to do the job right and to do it to the best of my ability. Thank you, Lord, for this unique responsibility and for allowing my trustworthiness to show. It is simply a reflection of Your goodness.
Part of working in the food industry requires clean facilities. Our family-owned pizza shop was due for a good Spring cleaning and guess who was put in charge of the heavy scrubbing while she is home for Spring break...me. My grandpa told me that I could be trusted to do a good job of it. So, today I started scrubbing the sides of the deep fryer, the oven, and a shelving unit. I forgot how much I enjoy hard, dirty work. If only I had more time to just clean instead of balancing that time with cooking.
I guess it feels good to be held responsible in this sort of case. It is motivation to do the job right and to do it to the best of my ability. Thank you, Lord, for this unique responsibility and for allowing my trustworthiness to show. It is simply a reflection of Your goodness.
Saturday, April 2, 2011
Wisdom
Day 74
We celebrated Dustin's birthday today with his family. I'm glad we have the opportunity to celebrate birthdays because they are a celebration and reminder of the gift of life. If Dustin had never existed, we would have no wedding to plan nor a lifetime to spend together. They say as you grow older grow wiser. I'm not sure how accurate that statement is, but I have definitely seen Dustin grow and mature since I've known him. With age and experience, one gains knowledge and wisdom. Celebrating another year of life also celebrates the opportunity of learning and gaining that wisdom. I'm pretty thankful for the man whom God has given me to be my future husband and I'm thankful for the years of life He has blessed him with and for the many more we will be able to share together.
We celebrated Dustin's birthday today with his family. I'm glad we have the opportunity to celebrate birthdays because they are a celebration and reminder of the gift of life. If Dustin had never existed, we would have no wedding to plan nor a lifetime to spend together. They say as you grow older grow wiser. I'm not sure how accurate that statement is, but I have definitely seen Dustin grow and mature since I've known him. With age and experience, one gains knowledge and wisdom. Celebrating another year of life also celebrates the opportunity of learning and gaining that wisdom. I'm pretty thankful for the man whom God has given me to be my future husband and I'm thankful for the years of life He has blessed him with and for the many more we will be able to share together.
Surprises
Day 73
Surprise bridal shower from my lovely friends from college! I had no idea what was going on when I was getting ready for the day. Both of my roommates were in on it yet they played it out well until I entered the party room on campus. I felt overwhelmed with happiness and knowing I am very much blessed. Some of my close friends that I've gotten to know throughout these years were able to come and celebrate with everyone else. It was quite a blessing to be able to call these wonderful ladies my friends. They had chocolate, fruit, cashews, balloons, gifts, and a slideshow of our engagement photos playing during the party. I am humbled and honored to have such amazing friends.
Surprise bridal shower from my lovely friends from college! I had no idea what was going on when I was getting ready for the day. Both of my roommates were in on it yet they played it out well until I entered the party room on campus. I felt overwhelmed with happiness and knowing I am very much blessed. Some of my close friends that I've gotten to know throughout these years were able to come and celebrate with everyone else. It was quite a blessing to be able to call these wonderful ladies my friends. They had chocolate, fruit, cashews, balloons, gifts, and a slideshow of our engagement photos playing during the party. I am humbled and honored to have such amazing friends.
Friday, March 25, 2011
Spring break!
Day 72
I am officially on Spring break!! Now I get to go home and finish wedding planning with my fiance and mom, work at the family pizza shop, and practice for my upcoming recital check. I don't really believe in relaxing break anymore; they are more an opportunity to get non-school stuff done. I will take a break once I get married I guess...which is in fifty days as of today.
At school, everyone had this energy of anticipation, of just getting through the day so everyone could go home. Many of my students will be traveling, hanging out, having sleep-overs, etc. Those were the days. I'm hoping to get a lot done this break so I can focus primarily on student teaching and my recital once I come back.
God has been so good in providing strength and perseverance to get through this much of the semester. I know He will continue to supply me with what I need. I'm very thankful for these upcoming two weeks to get a lot of work done, plans made, and money saved. It will be a nice change of pace and atmosphere, too.
I am officially on Spring break!! Now I get to go home and finish wedding planning with my fiance and mom, work at the family pizza shop, and practice for my upcoming recital check. I don't really believe in relaxing break anymore; they are more an opportunity to get non-school stuff done. I will take a break once I get married I guess...which is in fifty days as of today.
At school, everyone had this energy of anticipation, of just getting through the day so everyone could go home. Many of my students will be traveling, hanging out, having sleep-overs, etc. Those were the days. I'm hoping to get a lot done this break so I can focus primarily on student teaching and my recital once I come back.
God has been so good in providing strength and perseverance to get through this much of the semester. I know He will continue to supply me with what I need. I'm very thankful for these upcoming two weeks to get a lot of work done, plans made, and money saved. It will be a nice change of pace and atmosphere, too.
Thursday, March 24, 2011
Unfailing Love
Day 71
How do you measure love? How you fully experience God's love? Maybe it's by living according to His will; by acknowledging His outstretched arms on the cross as He died for all of us; maybe by loving others without thinking of benefiting ourselves; giving until we cannot possibly give anymore. I'm still trying to figure that out. God's love, as much as I do know, is unconditional. I doubt we can understand the full extent of "unconditional" love until we feel His love, agape love. How is it humanly possible to love someone unconditionally? We can definitely strive for that kind of love, but I don't think we could ever accurately imitate God's level of unconditional love.
I'm trying to put back together my spiritual life. As I do, I become more aware of God's endless patience as well as His love. I also see the selfless love shown by my fiance as we deal with individual finances, job opportunities, and me finishing school so we can get married. I guess we get a glimpse of God's unconditional love when we practice it to each other, especially to the ones we love most dearly. God is always there for me, Dustin is always there for me. I can see a slight parallel between the two displays of love and I'm very thankful that God can still love me after I've failed to daily acknowledge Him. I am also thankful that God can show His love through human beings as I see an example of His love through the way Dustin loves me.
God's love is such a deep subject. It is the most pure, the most patient, the most selfless. What a wonder that we are given the capabilities to experience even just a taste of such a love.
How do you measure love? How you fully experience God's love? Maybe it's by living according to His will; by acknowledging His outstretched arms on the cross as He died for all of us; maybe by loving others without thinking of benefiting ourselves; giving until we cannot possibly give anymore. I'm still trying to figure that out. God's love, as much as I do know, is unconditional. I doubt we can understand the full extent of "unconditional" love until we feel His love, agape love. How is it humanly possible to love someone unconditionally? We can definitely strive for that kind of love, but I don't think we could ever accurately imitate God's level of unconditional love.
I'm trying to put back together my spiritual life. As I do, I become more aware of God's endless patience as well as His love. I also see the selfless love shown by my fiance as we deal with individual finances, job opportunities, and me finishing school so we can get married. I guess we get a glimpse of God's unconditional love when we practice it to each other, especially to the ones we love most dearly. God is always there for me, Dustin is always there for me. I can see a slight parallel between the two displays of love and I'm very thankful that God can still love me after I've failed to daily acknowledge Him. I am also thankful that God can show His love through human beings as I see an example of His love through the way Dustin loves me.
God's love is such a deep subject. It is the most pure, the most patient, the most selfless. What a wonder that we are given the capabilities to experience even just a taste of such a love.
Wednesday, March 23, 2011
Familiarity
Day 70
I'm going to be married in 52 days and it hit me today that I will be living a completely new life, away from most of the things that I knew growing up and even some things that I will no longer have with me. My sister and I were looking through some pictures of our cats that we've raised from their birth. It's crazy to think that they are almost two years old! They are our boys and we love coming home to be greeted by them. I won't have that anymore once I'm married. Wow. That was just the beginning of the reality check...
I know that married life will be absolutely wonderful because I will be able to live life alongside my best friend and greatest companion. But I'm also becoming more thankful for those things with which I grew up and knew previously. Everything I experienced in my youth through high school will soon be put in boxes to store for memory's sake or given away to make room for the new things. I am excited about downsizing my personal inventory, don't get me wrong. I just need to get used to the fact that life will be different; I will be living with someone I've never lived with before, I will get to share my own kitchen, and everything I will own will be for our life together and for my teaching career.
I guess I will have to make some visits to my mom's house to check on the boys and the rest of the family. I'm so very thankful for those things that are so familiar to me, and for the things that will become familiar to me in the future.
I'm going to be married in 52 days and it hit me today that I will be living a completely new life, away from most of the things that I knew growing up and even some things that I will no longer have with me. My sister and I were looking through some pictures of our cats that we've raised from their birth. It's crazy to think that they are almost two years old! They are our boys and we love coming home to be greeted by them. I won't have that anymore once I'm married. Wow. That was just the beginning of the reality check...
I know that married life will be absolutely wonderful because I will be able to live life alongside my best friend and greatest companion. But I'm also becoming more thankful for those things with which I grew up and knew previously. Everything I experienced in my youth through high school will soon be put in boxes to store for memory's sake or given away to make room for the new things. I am excited about downsizing my personal inventory, don't get me wrong. I just need to get used to the fact that life will be different; I will be living with someone I've never lived with before, I will get to share my own kitchen, and everything I will own will be for our life together and for my teaching career.
I guess I will have to make some visits to my mom's house to check on the boys and the rest of the family. I'm so very thankful for those things that are so familiar to me, and for the things that will become familiar to me in the future.
Tuesday, March 22, 2011
Young Musicians
Day 69
I'm reminded of how I must have been when I started out on trumpet whenever I watch my students learn more about their instruments and general music. Yesterday, my trumpet students worked on long tone studies except we spiced it up and made it into a long note competition. They loved it! They even wanted to compete with me to see how well they could do against a college student. Truthfully, they did really well! And, whether they knew it or not, they were becoming better players by developing their air capacity and learning how to evenly distribute that air while they played. I'm so proud of my band kids.
Today marked the first round of classes to experience Music Free Day since it's the last week before Spring break and the end of the nine week grading period. Third grade students did music style bingo and enjoyed every minute of it. They were learning and reviewing different styles at the same time while making connections to styles they may have heard just listening to music in the car or from television. They definitely broadened their musical understanding today and it was a great experience to watch these young musicians grow and enjoy it at the same time. God, thank you so much for this precious opportunity to help these musicians grow and learn about music. They are such blessings in my life!
I'm reminded of how I must have been when I started out on trumpet whenever I watch my students learn more about their instruments and general music. Yesterday, my trumpet students worked on long tone studies except we spiced it up and made it into a long note competition. They loved it! They even wanted to compete with me to see how well they could do against a college student. Truthfully, they did really well! And, whether they knew it or not, they were becoming better players by developing their air capacity and learning how to evenly distribute that air while they played. I'm so proud of my band kids.
Today marked the first round of classes to experience Music Free Day since it's the last week before Spring break and the end of the nine week grading period. Third grade students did music style bingo and enjoyed every minute of it. They were learning and reviewing different styles at the same time while making connections to styles they may have heard just listening to music in the car or from television. They definitely broadened their musical understanding today and it was a great experience to watch these young musicians grow and enjoy it at the same time. God, thank you so much for this precious opportunity to help these musicians grow and learn about music. They are such blessings in my life!
Monday, March 21, 2011
Wise Counsel
Day 68
I went in for my follow up appointment after having a heart monitor. I talked with a very kind nurse practitioner who was very personable and genuine. I go to a Christian university but she is probably the first medical personnel to take a spiritual interest in me as a patient. She asked general questions about how I had been feeling, what my schedule is like (to determine stress levels), and what kind of symptoms were happening.
After we talked about the results of the monitor's readings, she gave me some advice on how to deal with the more stressful situations, especially moments in student teaching. The first thing she suggested was taking deep breaths as soon as I start to feel consciously stressed. It's supposed to calm one's body mentally and physically. She also recommended I start taking multi-vitamins to help regulate my vitamin and mineral intake. But the last thing she suggested really hit home and made me understand the importance of a solid prayer life and relationship with God. She suggested that I take the time driving to school to talk to God and to give the day to Him before the stress even begins. She brought up a passage from Philippians 4:6-8 which talks about not being anxious for anything and giving it all to God in thankfulness and praise, letting Him handle the worries while I focus on the good things.
I have been struggling with the fact that my spiritual life isn't where it needs to be. What the practitioner told me today was such a welcome reality check that fit right in with what God has been showing me and teaching me about strengthening my relationship with Him. I'm so thankful that I met with that lady today. Funny thing though: I was supposed to meet with the doctor who recommended I have the monitor in the first place, but today his daughter was sick so he was out of the office. I think it was definitely part of God's plan that that lady was in my life today.
I went in for my follow up appointment after having a heart monitor. I talked with a very kind nurse practitioner who was very personable and genuine. I go to a Christian university but she is probably the first medical personnel to take a spiritual interest in me as a patient. She asked general questions about how I had been feeling, what my schedule is like (to determine stress levels), and what kind of symptoms were happening.
After we talked about the results of the monitor's readings, she gave me some advice on how to deal with the more stressful situations, especially moments in student teaching. The first thing she suggested was taking deep breaths as soon as I start to feel consciously stressed. It's supposed to calm one's body mentally and physically. She also recommended I start taking multi-vitamins to help regulate my vitamin and mineral intake. But the last thing she suggested really hit home and made me understand the importance of a solid prayer life and relationship with God. She suggested that I take the time driving to school to talk to God and to give the day to Him before the stress even begins. She brought up a passage from Philippians 4:6-8 which talks about not being anxious for anything and giving it all to God in thankfulness and praise, letting Him handle the worries while I focus on the good things.
I have been struggling with the fact that my spiritual life isn't where it needs to be. What the practitioner told me today was such a welcome reality check that fit right in with what God has been showing me and teaching me about strengthening my relationship with Him. I'm so thankful that I met with that lady today. Funny thing though: I was supposed to meet with the doctor who recommended I have the monitor in the first place, but today his daughter was sick so he was out of the office. I think it was definitely part of God's plan that that lady was in my life today.
Sunday, March 20, 2011
Church
Day 67
I haven't been able to attend the church I go to while I'm at school for a while. It felt good to be back and to be in the midst of so many fellow believers worshiping together. The people at this church are always so friendly and helpful. They aren't afraid to talk to you, shake your hand, and ask how you are doing. I love that about them. It's a great example of how the people of God should treat guests and show them hospitality. It's so discouraging to walk into an unfamiliar church as a visitor and have everyone ignore you.
The message was also in line with how the Word of God should be preached. There were no compromises on interpretation, no bad word assumptions, and the speaker had done his share of research on the passage. It was encouraging to know that even though the church is looking for a senior pastor, they still held together and lifted each other up, even in their choice of guest speakers.
The worship also makes me smile. There is a great balance of contemporary and classic hymns, choir and orchestra, and there were no divas who sang every Sunday morning. The musicians knew their stuff and were genuine in their worship as they played.
It's always a breath of fresh air whenever I am able to attend their services. Thank you, Lord, for this wonderful group of people who make up a portion of Your church. Please continue to lead them and bless them as they aim to serve You in all they do.
I haven't been able to attend the church I go to while I'm at school for a while. It felt good to be back and to be in the midst of so many fellow believers worshiping together. The people at this church are always so friendly and helpful. They aren't afraid to talk to you, shake your hand, and ask how you are doing. I love that about them. It's a great example of how the people of God should treat guests and show them hospitality. It's so discouraging to walk into an unfamiliar church as a visitor and have everyone ignore you.
The message was also in line with how the Word of God should be preached. There were no compromises on interpretation, no bad word assumptions, and the speaker had done his share of research on the passage. It was encouraging to know that even though the church is looking for a senior pastor, they still held together and lifted each other up, even in their choice of guest speakers.
The worship also makes me smile. There is a great balance of contemporary and classic hymns, choir and orchestra, and there were no divas who sang every Sunday morning. The musicians knew their stuff and were genuine in their worship as they played.
It's always a breath of fresh air whenever I am able to attend their services. Thank you, Lord, for this wonderful group of people who make up a portion of Your church. Please continue to lead them and bless them as they aim to serve You in all they do.
Saturday, March 19, 2011
Time with My Best Friend
Day 66
Amazing day! Slept in, swept the floors, wiped down mirrors and dusted shelves, got ahead on student teaching stuff and...I got to spend the rest of the day with my fiance!! I can't help but brag on how he treats me, leads, works, and how he continues to grow in faith. God has definitely blessed me with an amazing husband to be and these last 56 days of single-hood can't go by fast enough.
Wedding planning is almost done and it's sad that so many brides-to-be get so worked up and stressed over planning their special day. He has been amazing yet again while he helps me every step of the way as we plan our wedding; heck, we even looked at flowers together today to get ideas for the arrangements and bouquets. If the planning does get a tad stressful, which is rare, he is always right there to encourage me on. I'm very much looking forward to our life together. God, please continue to guide us as we prepare for married life. May we strengthen our dedication to You and each other every step of the way. Thank you for such a wonderful friend.
Amazing day! Slept in, swept the floors, wiped down mirrors and dusted shelves, got ahead on student teaching stuff and...I got to spend the rest of the day with my fiance!! I can't help but brag on how he treats me, leads, works, and how he continues to grow in faith. God has definitely blessed me with an amazing husband to be and these last 56 days of single-hood can't go by fast enough.
Wedding planning is almost done and it's sad that so many brides-to-be get so worked up and stressed over planning their special day. He has been amazing yet again while he helps me every step of the way as we plan our wedding; heck, we even looked at flowers together today to get ideas for the arrangements and bouquets. If the planning does get a tad stressful, which is rare, he is always right there to encourage me on. I'm very much looking forward to our life together. God, please continue to guide us as we prepare for married life. May we strengthen our dedication to You and each other every step of the way. Thank you for such a wonderful friend.
Long Naps
Day 65
I haven't had the opportunity to take a nap in a while now, probably because of student teaching, what else is new...
I stayed on campus all day so I could attend a get together with fellow music majors this evening. I didn't feel like driving home then back to campus so I decided to grab a quick nap in the backseat of my car. It lasted over two hours...which felt amazing. I'm thankful for those rare moments when I can just let the busyness of life pass by for a few hours and enjoy some much needed rest, even if it's in the back of my car. Thank you, Lord, for the chances to catch up on rest, for myself and those who are also busy.
I haven't had the opportunity to take a nap in a while now, probably because of student teaching, what else is new...
I stayed on campus all day so I could attend a get together with fellow music majors this evening. I didn't feel like driving home then back to campus so I decided to grab a quick nap in the backseat of my car. It lasted over two hours...which felt amazing. I'm thankful for those rare moments when I can just let the busyness of life pass by for a few hours and enjoy some much needed rest, even if it's in the back of my car. Thank you, Lord, for the chances to catch up on rest, for myself and those who are also busy.
Thursday, March 17, 2011
Spring!
Day 64
Spring is just around the corner! Woohoo! I absolutely loved the warm weather today. I got to drive down the road with my windows open and my Journey CD cranked up high. Spring is the sign of new life, new beginnings. The taste of warmer weather today reminded me to be thankful for these chances to start anew, to finish what I've started, and to put on a positive outlook on life in general. I get to be married to my best friend in 58 days, I graduate college, I have the opportunity to finish my student teaching on a positive note, and put new motivation into preparing for my senior recital.
I love it when that refreshing feeling comes. It seems as though when things start to get monotonous and boring, God brings a light of new hope...and warmer, longer days. I'm so thankful for the warm weather today and for the renewed spirit of perseverance and motivation that comes with it.
Spring is just around the corner! Woohoo! I absolutely loved the warm weather today. I got to drive down the road with my windows open and my Journey CD cranked up high. Spring is the sign of new life, new beginnings. The taste of warmer weather today reminded me to be thankful for these chances to start anew, to finish what I've started, and to put on a positive outlook on life in general. I get to be married to my best friend in 58 days, I graduate college, I have the opportunity to finish my student teaching on a positive note, and put new motivation into preparing for my senior recital.
I love it when that refreshing feeling comes. It seems as though when things start to get monotonous and boring, God brings a light of new hope...and warmer, longer days. I'm so thankful for the warm weather today and for the renewed spirit of perseverance and motivation that comes with it.
Wednesday, March 16, 2011
Safe Drivers
Day 63
It seems like every day that I come across a driver who risks his safety and the safety of others as he drives down the road. Driving to or from student teaching always provides great opportunities for stories, some which are kind of scary. I'm rather tired of sharing the road with people who have little care for their fellow drivers. But on the other hand, I'm so thankful for those who are considerate in their driving, willing to watch out for the safety of others rather than trying to get somewhere as fast as they can or how much they can show off their peel-out skills. I've been in my share of car accidents, which probably has contributed to a more careful driving habit. I know we all have our road-rage moments, myself included, which makes me even more thankful for the safe drivers out there who aren't giving into road rage.
I guess I just need to do my best in being one of those safe drivers so I can help ensure the safety of those around me and hopefully set some example for others. Lord, please protect those who are driving tonight and who will be driving tomorrow. Please help those who take risks behind the wheel to realize they are putting people in danger. Thank you for those who are mindful of their and others safety.
It seems like every day that I come across a driver who risks his safety and the safety of others as he drives down the road. Driving to or from student teaching always provides great opportunities for stories, some which are kind of scary. I'm rather tired of sharing the road with people who have little care for their fellow drivers. But on the other hand, I'm so thankful for those who are considerate in their driving, willing to watch out for the safety of others rather than trying to get somewhere as fast as they can or how much they can show off their peel-out skills. I've been in my share of car accidents, which probably has contributed to a more careful driving habit. I know we all have our road-rage moments, myself included, which makes me even more thankful for the safe drivers out there who aren't giving into road rage.
I guess I just need to do my best in being one of those safe drivers so I can help ensure the safety of those around me and hopefully set some example for others. Lord, please protect those who are driving tonight and who will be driving tomorrow. Please help those who take risks behind the wheel to realize they are putting people in danger. Thank you for those who are mindful of their and others safety.
Tuesday, March 15, 2011
Time with the Girls
We are all very busy this semester with lesson plans, wedding plans, student teaching, and internships but we always seem to get a little bit of time in every night to talk, joke, accomplish work together, and just be in the same room as each other. I'm thankful for my roomies and I am blessed to have them as my friends.
We feel comfortable talking about pretty much anything and everything; venting when we need it; uplifting each other on bad days; and going shopping together or for each other. These girls are a huge part of keeping me sane this semester. When the going gets tough, the girls get tougher. God, please bless my roommates, those wonderful girls who help make life more bearable and worthwhile.
Monday, March 14, 2011
Instrumental music
Day 61
As I write this I am listening to Symphony No. 7 in A Major by Beethoven. Ah, I love Beethoven's music. It's beautifully written and emotionally charged. He has such an understanding and way of working with the music to make it what it is, even when he couldn't hear his own compositions. I was able to have sectionals with my band students today and witnessed yet again the joy of experiencing instrumental music in its early stages of understanding. The students are learning so many new things at once. Of course, instrumental music is full of learning new things simultaneously; reading, fingering, breathing, notation, dynamics, etc. I love to see the light bulb go off in their minds when a concept clicks and they are then able to apply that concept to other areas of their music experience.
It is also interesting to see the many different levels that they are at. Some are still making the mental connection between seeing what note is written and the fingering or position that corresponds with seeing that note. Then there are some who are beginning to fine tune their music reading. They are starting to understand how to perform dynamics, better breathing techniques, and how to perform as an ensemble. I get all excited when they realize their own potential because I was once in their shoes, just learning my own instrument.
God, thank you so much for the beautiful gift of music, especially instrumental music. May we always see its importance in school and in our lives.
As I write this I am listening to Symphony No. 7 in A Major by Beethoven. Ah, I love Beethoven's music. It's beautifully written and emotionally charged. He has such an understanding and way of working with the music to make it what it is, even when he couldn't hear his own compositions. I was able to have sectionals with my band students today and witnessed yet again the joy of experiencing instrumental music in its early stages of understanding. The students are learning so many new things at once. Of course, instrumental music is full of learning new things simultaneously; reading, fingering, breathing, notation, dynamics, etc. I love to see the light bulb go off in their minds when a concept clicks and they are then able to apply that concept to other areas of their music experience.
It is also interesting to see the many different levels that they are at. Some are still making the mental connection between seeing what note is written and the fingering or position that corresponds with seeing that note. Then there are some who are beginning to fine tune their music reading. They are starting to understand how to perform dynamics, better breathing techniques, and how to perform as an ensemble. I get all excited when they realize their own potential because I was once in their shoes, just learning my own instrument.
God, thank you so much for the beautiful gift of music, especially instrumental music. May we always see its importance in school and in our lives.
Sunday, March 13, 2011
Time with Mom
Day 60
I don't get a lot of time with my mom as much as I did when I wasn't engaged or in college for that matter. She has always been there for me and has always helped me through life. If it weren't for my mom, I wouldn't be half the person I am. Today I got to spend a little time with her before heading back to school after a weekend working at home to earn a few extra bucks. She took me shopping for groceries, things for my students, and bought me some Dairy Queen before I headed back. I really appreciate my mom and all she does for me, even the little things like a bowl of ice cream.
Reality is slowly beginning to hit. I'm gradually acknowledging that, soon, I will no longer be living with my immediate blood family. Life will be different. Wonderful, but different. God thank you so much for my amazing mom. Bless her and keep her close to You.
I don't get a lot of time with my mom as much as I did when I wasn't engaged or in college for that matter. She has always been there for me and has always helped me through life. If it weren't for my mom, I wouldn't be half the person I am. Today I got to spend a little time with her before heading back to school after a weekend working at home to earn a few extra bucks. She took me shopping for groceries, things for my students, and bought me some Dairy Queen before I headed back. I really appreciate my mom and all she does for me, even the little things like a bowl of ice cream.
Reality is slowly beginning to hit. I'm gradually acknowledging that, soon, I will no longer be living with my immediate blood family. Life will be different. Wonderful, but different. God thank you so much for my amazing mom. Bless her and keep her close to You.
Things Coming Together
Day 59
My dear friend and coworker showed me her ideas for the decorations for our wedding. She is very creative and is known for her organization and handiwork. She had the entire reception hall planned out! I seriously think she's an angel in disguise for doing all of that. Everything looked amazing and her ideas were similar or exactly to what my fiance and I had thought about. Everything from the wedding party table, the centerpieces, to the bubbles our guests would have for the exit, she had an idea of what she wanted to do and everything matched our colors and plans. It was a huge weight off my shoulders to think we didn't have to worry about organizing and figuring out decorations ourselves this close to the wedding. Lord, thank you for such a wonderful friend!
I was able to work nine hours at the family pizza shop which gave me the gas money for the week...and maybe, just maybe, a little extra to have to spend on my students :) My heart monitor is now being read and the results will be in this week. That's another item of business that can be checked off the list of things to do.
At this point, it's pretty much smooth sailing for the wedding planning. I know if God can get us through that bit of life, He can definitely take care of my recital and student teaching.
My dear friend and coworker showed me her ideas for the decorations for our wedding. She is very creative and is known for her organization and handiwork. She had the entire reception hall planned out! I seriously think she's an angel in disguise for doing all of that. Everything looked amazing and her ideas were similar or exactly to what my fiance and I had thought about. Everything from the wedding party table, the centerpieces, to the bubbles our guests would have for the exit, she had an idea of what she wanted to do and everything matched our colors and plans. It was a huge weight off my shoulders to think we didn't have to worry about organizing and figuring out decorations ourselves this close to the wedding. Lord, thank you for such a wonderful friend!
I was able to work nine hours at the family pizza shop which gave me the gas money for the week...and maybe, just maybe, a little extra to have to spend on my students :) My heart monitor is now being read and the results will be in this week. That's another item of business that can be checked off the list of things to do.
At this point, it's pretty much smooth sailing for the wedding planning. I know if God can get us through that bit of life, He can definitely take care of my recital and student teaching.
Friday, March 11, 2011
Eventful Fun Days
Day 58
Today was just a great day overall. I am thankful for these kinds of days especially since they seem to come far and few between. For once I was able to get an adequate amount of sleep which allowed me to be awake in the morning, my heart monitor is tolerable, the students did well most of the day, my observation hit high marks, I got to skype for two hours with my fiance, caught up a little bit on the Biggest Loser and Bones, and I'm going to bed after having a banana and peanut butter washed down with hot chamomile tea.
God is so good. I say that a lot, but it's so true. When the weeks seem to be getting no less longer, He blesses us with a day that is tolerable and uplifting. Our God is truly an awesome God.
I could go on and on about His goodness today but suffice it to say that it was full of blessing, laughter, and light-hearted carefree relaxation. I hope we all can remember to take a break and look for the little things in life that make it livable, and to thank God, the One who has generously blessed us with so much to begin with.
Today was just a great day overall. I am thankful for these kinds of days especially since they seem to come far and few between. For once I was able to get an adequate amount of sleep which allowed me to be awake in the morning, my heart monitor is tolerable, the students did well most of the day, my observation hit high marks, I got to skype for two hours with my fiance, caught up a little bit on the Biggest Loser and Bones, and I'm going to bed after having a banana and peanut butter washed down with hot chamomile tea.
God is so good. I say that a lot, but it's so true. When the weeks seem to be getting no less longer, He blesses us with a day that is tolerable and uplifting. Our God is truly an awesome God.
I could go on and on about His goodness today but suffice it to say that it was full of blessing, laughter, and light-hearted carefree relaxation. I hope we all can remember to take a break and look for the little things in life that make it livable, and to thank God, the One who has generously blessed us with so much to begin with.
Thursday, March 10, 2011
People Who Care
Day 57
It's been a rough few weeks with student teaching, early mornings, heart palpitations, and busy schedules but somehow I'm still functioning. It's not a mystery that God has placed very wonderful people in my life to help my get by and thrive through the harder times. My mom and grandparents have done so much to help out with the wedding finances; my extended family is doing all kinds of smaller tasks to help the wedding run smoothly that day; my fiance stands by me every day, good or bad, and always is there to listen and remind me that I'm beautiful; my roommates are always encouraging and motivating by their hard work and dedication.
I find it easy to not be thankful for things and people, but I'm glad I have this opportunity to develop a discipline and a habit of thankfulness, especially those who have and are impacting my life every day. It's so easy to get discouraged and down-hearted, but these awesome people are always there to lift me up and be my solid rocks. Thank you, God, for placing these amazing people in my life right now, when I need them most. They truly are living blessings of Your goodness and grace. I don't know what I could do without them. Bless each and every one of them.
It's been a rough few weeks with student teaching, early mornings, heart palpitations, and busy schedules but somehow I'm still functioning. It's not a mystery that God has placed very wonderful people in my life to help my get by and thrive through the harder times. My mom and grandparents have done so much to help out with the wedding finances; my extended family is doing all kinds of smaller tasks to help the wedding run smoothly that day; my fiance stands by me every day, good or bad, and always is there to listen and remind me that I'm beautiful; my roommates are always encouraging and motivating by their hard work and dedication.
I find it easy to not be thankful for things and people, but I'm glad I have this opportunity to develop a discipline and a habit of thankfulness, especially those who have and are impacting my life every day. It's so easy to get discouraged and down-hearted, but these awesome people are always there to lift me up and be my solid rocks. Thank you, God, for placing these amazing people in my life right now, when I need them most. They truly are living blessings of Your goodness and grace. I don't know what I could do without them. Bless each and every one of them.
Wednesday, March 9, 2011
Duct Tape
Day 56
I will have to clarify the title. I am referring to the actual adhesive but also to God's "duct tape", His goodness and perfect plan that holds us all together as believers under His love and grace. I refer to the more spiritual duct tape in light of today. I'm trying to get about eight hours of sleep a night to be ready to rock and roll with seven or so classes of energetic students all day. But today, my eight hours failed me. After presenting lessons, tending to discipline issues, getting ready for the next class in five minutes or less, and lunch duty, I was ready to head home and get some housework done. On the way to campus, I was feeling particularly drowsy from the day's activities so I cranked up my rock music and tried to keep myself awake on the road. I usually never nod off while I'm driving. I did today. It was only for a second but when I opened my eyes, I was left of center with traffic coming my way. Reflex (and God's grace) told me to swerve back into my lane. Thanks to the adrenaline rush from the shock I was able to make it to campus without dozing off again. Talk about scary. So tonight, I'm getting eight and a half hours and eating snacks during the school day to keep my energy up.
Duct tape in the literal sense brought a smile to my face today as my fiance told me of the things he had been doing with the apartment. He started to bring some aesthetics to the kitchen with a shelf topped with old-style root beer and Coke bottles. The Coke bottle wasn't balancing very well so,...he added some duct tape to the bottom of the bottle to steady it. The creative man he is, he also fashioned a duct tape remote holder for his chair in the living room. Pure genius if you ask me. Yup, that's my man. I know we will never be without a stroke of creativity and fun in our home.
Thank you, God, for keeping me safe and for the creativity of my wonderful fiance when it comes to Your "duct tape" and his.
I will have to clarify the title. I am referring to the actual adhesive but also to God's "duct tape", His goodness and perfect plan that holds us all together as believers under His love and grace. I refer to the more spiritual duct tape in light of today. I'm trying to get about eight hours of sleep a night to be ready to rock and roll with seven or so classes of energetic students all day. But today, my eight hours failed me. After presenting lessons, tending to discipline issues, getting ready for the next class in five minutes or less, and lunch duty, I was ready to head home and get some housework done. On the way to campus, I was feeling particularly drowsy from the day's activities so I cranked up my rock music and tried to keep myself awake on the road. I usually never nod off while I'm driving. I did today. It was only for a second but when I opened my eyes, I was left of center with traffic coming my way. Reflex (and God's grace) told me to swerve back into my lane. Thanks to the adrenaline rush from the shock I was able to make it to campus without dozing off again. Talk about scary. So tonight, I'm getting eight and a half hours and eating snacks during the school day to keep my energy up.
Duct tape in the literal sense brought a smile to my face today as my fiance told me of the things he had been doing with the apartment. He started to bring some aesthetics to the kitchen with a shelf topped with old-style root beer and Coke bottles. The Coke bottle wasn't balancing very well so,...he added some duct tape to the bottom of the bottle to steady it. The creative man he is, he also fashioned a duct tape remote holder for his chair in the living room. Pure genius if you ask me. Yup, that's my man. I know we will never be without a stroke of creativity and fun in our home.
Thank you, God, for keeping me safe and for the creativity of my wonderful fiance when it comes to Your "duct tape" and his.
Tuesday, March 8, 2011
Motivation
Day 55
Today was rough across the board with all of my classes. The Kindergarten would not listen nor follow directions, the first grade students were hurting each other's feelings and not listening, the second graders treated music class like a free period and only half the class was truly involved in what I was trying to present. I have a lot of work to do this week on tweaking my lessons and teaching methods. I think a lot of it is just keeping the class moving, switching up activities like crazy, and trying to have controlled fun with them. I love my students but they sure know how to make a day hectic and long.
On the drive home, I got to thinking how I could do better in my classes. I thought of organization ideas, activities, formatting the lessons so they flowed and the energy kept moving, and tons of other things. I stopped at four different stores trying to find graph paper to make charts, came home with poster board for keeping track of points, and I started working on a binder to organize my band kids' points. As soon as I started on those projects, my day became so much better. I just hope the effort pays off in the end. I'm so thankful for this small ounce of motivation that will end up helping me and the students in the long run.
Today was rough across the board with all of my classes. The Kindergarten would not listen nor follow directions, the first grade students were hurting each other's feelings and not listening, the second graders treated music class like a free period and only half the class was truly involved in what I was trying to present. I have a lot of work to do this week on tweaking my lessons and teaching methods. I think a lot of it is just keeping the class moving, switching up activities like crazy, and trying to have controlled fun with them. I love my students but they sure know how to make a day hectic and long.
On the drive home, I got to thinking how I could do better in my classes. I thought of organization ideas, activities, formatting the lessons so they flowed and the energy kept moving, and tons of other things. I stopped at four different stores trying to find graph paper to make charts, came home with poster board for keeping track of points, and I started working on a binder to organize my band kids' points. As soon as I started on those projects, my day became so much better. I just hope the effort pays off in the end. I'm so thankful for this small ounce of motivation that will end up helping me and the students in the long run.
Monday, March 7, 2011
Strength to Keep Going
Day 54
I don't think I believe in a day off any more. I have been going full speed ahead for a while now and I just need to keep trucking. Amidst lesson plans, private lessons, going home to work, traveling, appointments, decent bedtimes, and wedding planning, I don't think I've taken a true day off since Christmas break. I'm functioning on about five and a half hours as it is and I still have four days left of the school week to prepare and get ready for.
Spring break is coming up but it will be filled with work, wedding details, visiting, traveling, practicing, and maybe some sleep thrown in here and there. I'm looking forward to getting a lot done during that break but I will also be ready to finally have a true break when all is said and done. I'm going to have to wait til I'm married just to have some down time. I'm so thankful though for the support from my family, friends, and hubby to be. They keep me going and they encourage me to hang in there even when I'm spent. God continues to give me the strength to keep going and the discipline to schedule my days carefully so I can make the most of my precious minutes. So, here's to another week and to God's never-ending grace and provision.
I don't think I believe in a day off any more. I have been going full speed ahead for a while now and I just need to keep trucking. Amidst lesson plans, private lessons, going home to work, traveling, appointments, decent bedtimes, and wedding planning, I don't think I've taken a true day off since Christmas break. I'm functioning on about five and a half hours as it is and I still have four days left of the school week to prepare and get ready for.
Spring break is coming up but it will be filled with work, wedding details, visiting, traveling, practicing, and maybe some sleep thrown in here and there. I'm looking forward to getting a lot done during that break but I will also be ready to finally have a true break when all is said and done. I'm going to have to wait til I'm married just to have some down time. I'm so thankful though for the support from my family, friends, and hubby to be. They keep me going and they encourage me to hang in there even when I'm spent. God continues to give me the strength to keep going and the discipline to schedule my days carefully so I can make the most of my precious minutes. So, here's to another week and to God's never-ending grace and provision.
Sunday, March 6, 2011
First Home
Day 53
My fiance moved into what will soon be "our" apartment today. He chose it in a safe location, within walking distance of his job, a low rent payment each month, and decent living space. We get to give the place our own personal touch when I move in once we get married but for now he's doing a great job of getting minor repairs taken care of and making sure it will be suitable for the two of us come May.
It was good to spend some time discussing the future plans involving the apartment and figuring out details like parking, shopping, and our new surroundings. It was a major reality check that married life is just around the corner, sixty-nine days to be exact. God is so good in providing us with our first home, the finances to afford it, and the supplies to make it our own for a while.
Married life will be awesome.
My fiance moved into what will soon be "our" apartment today. He chose it in a safe location, within walking distance of his job, a low rent payment each month, and decent living space. We get to give the place our own personal touch when I move in once we get married but for now he's doing a great job of getting minor repairs taken care of and making sure it will be suitable for the two of us come May.
It was good to spend some time discussing the future plans involving the apartment and figuring out details like parking, shopping, and our new surroundings. It was a major reality check that married life is just around the corner, sixty-nine days to be exact. God is so good in providing us with our first home, the finances to afford it, and the supplies to make it our own for a while.
Married life will be awesome.
Relaxing Moments
Day 52
I was finding it hard to be thankful for anything today. It was generally a rough day. It started out okay but it slowly began to wear on me. Working nine hours is a killer to begin with, but couple that with a coworker who has it in their mind to be annoying all night and decide that everyone is due for a joke, and you get a recipe for headache and short patience.
At the end of the day, I just wanted to take a long, hot shower and go to bed. But being on my feet all day, and all week for that matter, I felt like taking a few moments to myself and watch television, something I don't do often at college. I'm so thankful for those few moments of sitting on the couch, flipping through the channels, swapping inside jokes with my brother. A rough day is rough, but God always gives the grace to get through it and relax for a bit.
I was finding it hard to be thankful for anything today. It was generally a rough day. It started out okay but it slowly began to wear on me. Working nine hours is a killer to begin with, but couple that with a coworker who has it in their mind to be annoying all night and decide that everyone is due for a joke, and you get a recipe for headache and short patience.
At the end of the day, I just wanted to take a long, hot shower and go to bed. But being on my feet all day, and all week for that matter, I felt like taking a few moments to myself and watch television, something I don't do often at college. I'm so thankful for those few moments of sitting on the couch, flipping through the channels, swapping inside jokes with my brother. A rough day is rough, but God always gives the grace to get through it and relax for a bit.
Kindergarten
Day 51
It's been a rough going with figuring out how to effectively teach Kindergarten classes with only twenty minute class periods. I'm slowly learning that the more kinesthetic the activity is, the more focused the students are. However, the flipside involves knowing how to effectively control their behavior while presenting and teaching a lesson that has to meet a certain objective. I learned last time that the faster paced the class was, the smoother things went. I applied it to today's classes while spending very little time on handling misbehavior. It was so much fun! I was as active as they were and they seemed to enjoy that more personal involvement.
Kindergarten is definitely its own animal when it comes to teaching technique and how to handle the class while presenting the lesson. But you got to love little kids who steal your heart every day they walk in to the music classroom. Thank you, Lord, for this opportunity to learn from these young students and to develop my teaching skills that will honor You now and when I become a full-time teacher.
It's been a rough going with figuring out how to effectively teach Kindergarten classes with only twenty minute class periods. I'm slowly learning that the more kinesthetic the activity is, the more focused the students are. However, the flipside involves knowing how to effectively control their behavior while presenting and teaching a lesson that has to meet a certain objective. I learned last time that the faster paced the class was, the smoother things went. I applied it to today's classes while spending very little time on handling misbehavior. It was so much fun! I was as active as they were and they seemed to enjoy that more personal involvement.
Kindergarten is definitely its own animal when it comes to teaching technique and how to handle the class while presenting the lesson. But you got to love little kids who steal your heart every day they walk in to the music classroom. Thank you, Lord, for this opportunity to learn from these young students and to develop my teaching skills that will honor You now and when I become a full-time teacher.
Thursday, March 3, 2011
Encouragement
Day 50
Our music educator's organization had the chance to skype with a former student and a student teacher who are both teaching overseas right now. One was in China and one was in Ecuador. They both had overwhelming workloads as they both taught all grades from kindergarten to twelfth with everything in between. From general music in the preschool level to high school marching band, they were involved with it all. I thought it was sort of overwhelming with just general music and fourth and fifth grade band.
They definitely gave great words of encouragement for us teachers-to-be and gave great examples of all the good things that have come of their experiences so far. It made me want to come home and get to work on thinking of creative ways to teach my students about music. I love those kids and I really want to experiment with ways to make the learning experience better and more exciting. I have a ton of thoughts running through my mind right now. I'm pretty thankful for the encouragement we received tonight. I can't wait to have my very own classroom full of kids!
Our music educator's organization had the chance to skype with a former student and a student teacher who are both teaching overseas right now. One was in China and one was in Ecuador. They both had overwhelming workloads as they both taught all grades from kindergarten to twelfth with everything in between. From general music in the preschool level to high school marching band, they were involved with it all. I thought it was sort of overwhelming with just general music and fourth and fifth grade band.
They definitely gave great words of encouragement for us teachers-to-be and gave great examples of all the good things that have come of their experiences so far. It made me want to come home and get to work on thinking of creative ways to teach my students about music. I love those kids and I really want to experiment with ways to make the learning experience better and more exciting. I have a ton of thoughts running through my mind right now. I'm pretty thankful for the encouragement we received tonight. I can't wait to have my very own classroom full of kids!
Wednesday, March 2, 2011
Good days
Day 49
Kindergarten: my project for this semester. Today, they did really well with the lesson! Yes! I was so glad the lesson went as I planned. I think one of the keys was to keep them moving, seeing that they are a very kinesthetic age group. Focusing on some of the students' behavior, not all of them, led to peer pressure and then the rest of them would behave and follow directions if the majority of the class was doing something. After they left, I felt relieved. During lunch duty, a few of the kindergarten students came up to me and started to sing the song that we did in class! That was exciting. Any day with good kindergarten classes is a good day.
Also, after praying and talking about it, my fiance and I officially have our first apartment that we will both live in once we're married! God is so good and He continues to provide for us. My fiance moves in this Saturday and I will join him after we tie the knot. That's about as exciting as a good kindergarten day.
Homework is done, tomorrow is another day closer to the weekend, things are under control, and God is still sovereign. I"m thankful for good days and I will gladly take them any day.
Kindergarten: my project for this semester. Today, they did really well with the lesson! Yes! I was so glad the lesson went as I planned. I think one of the keys was to keep them moving, seeing that they are a very kinesthetic age group. Focusing on some of the students' behavior, not all of them, led to peer pressure and then the rest of them would behave and follow directions if the majority of the class was doing something. After they left, I felt relieved. During lunch duty, a few of the kindergarten students came up to me and started to sing the song that we did in class! That was exciting. Any day with good kindergarten classes is a good day.
Also, after praying and talking about it, my fiance and I officially have our first apartment that we will both live in once we're married! God is so good and He continues to provide for us. My fiance moves in this Saturday and I will join him after we tie the knot. That's about as exciting as a good kindergarten day.
Homework is done, tomorrow is another day closer to the weekend, things are under control, and God is still sovereign. I"m thankful for good days and I will gladly take them any day.
Tuesday, March 1, 2011
Patience
Day 48
Patience is usually not a problem in my life but today brought on many instances where I need to be more graceful in being patient. During the school day, I was faced with twenty-four kindergarten students with several of them having multiple disabilities. It was hard to get anything done with them during the twenty minutes I had. On a lighter note of working on patience, my fiance found a prospective apartment that will more than likely be our first home together once we're married. Now it's even harder to wait for the wedding to get here so we can start a chapter of life with just the two of us. I don't see it as a negative issue but it is getting harder and harder to be patient about waiting for something so wonderful and blessed.
Students themselves try my patience every once in a while throughout the school day. I think it's just another hurdle I have to jump while I'm learning to be a teacher. God, thank you for the patience you've given me. Please continue to help me work on the patience that still needs to be cultivated.
Patience is usually not a problem in my life but today brought on many instances where I need to be more graceful in being patient. During the school day, I was faced with twenty-four kindergarten students with several of them having multiple disabilities. It was hard to get anything done with them during the twenty minutes I had. On a lighter note of working on patience, my fiance found a prospective apartment that will more than likely be our first home together once we're married. Now it's even harder to wait for the wedding to get here so we can start a chapter of life with just the two of us. I don't see it as a negative issue but it is getting harder and harder to be patient about waiting for something so wonderful and blessed.
Students themselves try my patience every once in a while throughout the school day. I think it's just another hurdle I have to jump while I'm learning to be a teacher. God, thank you for the patience you've given me. Please continue to help me work on the patience that still needs to be cultivated.
Monday, February 28, 2011
Promises
Day 47
God gives us many promises throughout the Bible. One of His promises that I've come to notice more and more often is the promise of provision. While getting ready for the next chapter of life, my fiance and I are looking for an apartment, getting finances figured out, and attempting to find a job for me in the area where we will be living. It can get very stressful at times just trying to figure so many things out. But God is so good and He continues to show His provision day after day. I somehow manage to have enough money to get me enough gas to last the week and to buy just enough groceries. My fiance has been looking high and low for a decent-sized apartment that will fit his budget (and eventually our budget). We've come across some, but the more ideal ones are just outside the price range. He came across one that he is looking at soon and this one might be the one, Lord willing! Jobs are out there, it's just a matter of applying and getting my name out in the area schools or food businesses. My fiance came up with a total of about twenty area schools that I could apply to as well as a lengthy list of local food businesses that could get me through the summer and maybe as a supplemental job if the teaching doesn't work out right away.
I am so thankful for God's provision. I often fall back into the pit of despair and worry but after some prayer and encouraging conversations with my best friend, I am always reminded that God will get us through and whatever happens will result in His glory and will be according to His will.
God gives us many promises throughout the Bible. One of His promises that I've come to notice more and more often is the promise of provision. While getting ready for the next chapter of life, my fiance and I are looking for an apartment, getting finances figured out, and attempting to find a job for me in the area where we will be living. It can get very stressful at times just trying to figure so many things out. But God is so good and He continues to show His provision day after day. I somehow manage to have enough money to get me enough gas to last the week and to buy just enough groceries. My fiance has been looking high and low for a decent-sized apartment that will fit his budget (and eventually our budget). We've come across some, but the more ideal ones are just outside the price range. He came across one that he is looking at soon and this one might be the one, Lord willing! Jobs are out there, it's just a matter of applying and getting my name out in the area schools or food businesses. My fiance came up with a total of about twenty area schools that I could apply to as well as a lengthy list of local food businesses that could get me through the summer and maybe as a supplemental job if the teaching doesn't work out right away.
I am so thankful for God's provision. I often fall back into the pit of despair and worry but after some prayer and encouraging conversations with my best friend, I am always reminded that God will get us through and whatever happens will result in His glory and will be according to His will.
Sunday, February 27, 2011
Safety
Day 46
Safety is taken for granted too often in my life. My sister and I were heading back to campus tonight in the rain. However, it was the whole spectrum of rain intensity. We had mist, drizzle, steady rain, and pure downpour, complete with flashes of lightening and thunder. Don't get me wrong, I'm glad Spring is on its way, but this was ridiculous. My fiance came through for me again and had just replaced the windshield wipers on my car before we headed out. Good thing he did, that's all I got to say.
I feel for those who drive in that or worse every day. My dad is a truck driver and I can't imagine having to navigate a big rig through ice, snow, or torrential rain. I commend you all for braving the weather and nasty road conditions.
Thank you, Lord, for keeping us safe on the way back and for keeping an eye on those who are still on the road 24/7. Please keep them safe as well.
Safety is taken for granted too often in my life. My sister and I were heading back to campus tonight in the rain. However, it was the whole spectrum of rain intensity. We had mist, drizzle, steady rain, and pure downpour, complete with flashes of lightening and thunder. Don't get me wrong, I'm glad Spring is on its way, but this was ridiculous. My fiance came through for me again and had just replaced the windshield wipers on my car before we headed out. Good thing he did, that's all I got to say.
I feel for those who drive in that or worse every day. My dad is a truck driver and I can't imagine having to navigate a big rig through ice, snow, or torrential rain. I commend you all for braving the weather and nasty road conditions.
Thank you, Lord, for keeping us safe on the way back and for keeping an eye on those who are still on the road 24/7. Please keep them safe as well.
Bragging Rights
Day 45
I feel like I probably mention my fiance too much in my blogs but this weekend already proves just how amazing he is. With the wedding only 77 days away and student teaching going full swing, I am probably easily beyond the normal limits of stress. But, I'm used to it after four years as a music education major trying to make it to graduation in only four years. Stress is overrated. Just saying.
Anyway, my fiance has stood by my side and has led me through the rough spots in my life since I've met him. This weekend alone proves how much he is my hero. Finances are very tight, and with a car that requires premium gas, it's even rougher with the ever-rising gas prices. In walks prince charming with a gas gift card to help me make it through the week.
My schedule is crazy busy so I don't have as much time as I would like to spend on the remaining wedding stuff like our scrapbook. He willingly puts it together basically by himself and purchases a frame for a free collage he made through Wal-greens.
He opens doors for me, helps me with my coat, gives the best hugs, is the best listener and advice-giver, is the funniest man I know, he works hard, helps me with homework, etc. I could go on and on.
I've recently noticed that my heart has started to flutter every now and then throughout the day. I told him about it, which freaked him out, but it's probably due mostly to stress. He stayed up and chatted on the phone with me, made me promise to get it checked out, and put me on a no-caffeine diet.
Basically, that was my weekend. But more importantly is was a great opportunity to see who God was really giving to me as a husband. I am so blessed to be his and I am so thankful that God introduced us in the first place.
I feel like I probably mention my fiance too much in my blogs but this weekend already proves just how amazing he is. With the wedding only 77 days away and student teaching going full swing, I am probably easily beyond the normal limits of stress. But, I'm used to it after four years as a music education major trying to make it to graduation in only four years. Stress is overrated. Just saying.
Anyway, my fiance has stood by my side and has led me through the rough spots in my life since I've met him. This weekend alone proves how much he is my hero. Finances are very tight, and with a car that requires premium gas, it's even rougher with the ever-rising gas prices. In walks prince charming with a gas gift card to help me make it through the week.
My schedule is crazy busy so I don't have as much time as I would like to spend on the remaining wedding stuff like our scrapbook. He willingly puts it together basically by himself and purchases a frame for a free collage he made through Wal-greens.
He opens doors for me, helps me with my coat, gives the best hugs, is the best listener and advice-giver, is the funniest man I know, he works hard, helps me with homework, etc. I could go on and on.
I've recently noticed that my heart has started to flutter every now and then throughout the day. I told him about it, which freaked him out, but it's probably due mostly to stress. He stayed up and chatted on the phone with me, made me promise to get it checked out, and put me on a no-caffeine diet.
Basically, that was my weekend. But more importantly is was a great opportunity to see who God was really giving to me as a husband. I am so blessed to be his and I am so thankful that God introduced us in the first place.
Friday, February 25, 2011
Late Starts
Day 44
Snow day!!! I'm excited about it until I think of it in terms of being a teacher: now my Friday music classes are another week behind since I only see most of them once a week. Yikes. But...as a college student, I welcome snow days because I can get caught up and ahead on homework, sleep in, get housework done, pamper myself a bit, and enjoy the day at a nice, unstressful, relaxing pace. I got ten hours of sleep, stayed in my pajamas until noon, organized my space, took my time getting ready for the day, played with the trumpet studio class, got homework done, and watched Tangled on campus for no cost! Then I came home, did my nails and watched an episode of Bones.
It's been a great day. Even better is the fact that tomorrow I get my second dress fitting and then I see my wonderful fiance later. God is good. I hope all you who were traveling today were safe drivers and made it to your destination and back without much problem. Go enjoy a hot drink, fuzzy slipper socks, and warm pajamas tonight away from the cold. God bless!
Snow day!!! I'm excited about it until I think of it in terms of being a teacher: now my Friday music classes are another week behind since I only see most of them once a week. Yikes. But...as a college student, I welcome snow days because I can get caught up and ahead on homework, sleep in, get housework done, pamper myself a bit, and enjoy the day at a nice, unstressful, relaxing pace. I got ten hours of sleep, stayed in my pajamas until noon, organized my space, took my time getting ready for the day, played with the trumpet studio class, got homework done, and watched Tangled on campus for no cost! Then I came home, did my nails and watched an episode of Bones.
It's been a great day. Even better is the fact that tomorrow I get my second dress fitting and then I see my wonderful fiance later. God is good. I hope all you who were traveling today were safe drivers and made it to your destination and back without much problem. Go enjoy a hot drink, fuzzy slipper socks, and warm pajamas tonight away from the cold. God bless!
Thursday, February 24, 2011
Learning How to be a Teacher
Day 43
Student teaching has had its ups and downs already. I struggle sometimes with controlling and keeping the attention of a class full of twenty plus kindergarten students with multiple inclusion students. It can be quite a zoo in the music classroom sometimes. Today, my teacher and I had a great chat about different methods to try on the crazier classes. Keeping the schedule flowing and full of variety while maintaining structure seems to be the key so far.
I've been up trying to come up with different ideas for my Friday classes since they seem to be the most interesting to teach. They are all wonderful students, I just have to learn how to cater to them as a class as well as individuals while maintaining my role as the teacher. I enjoy the challenges and my teacher is patient with me as I learn from my mistakes. I've come up with some new things to help keep the classes organized and structured and I'm excited to try them out tomorrow. Friday=off-the-wall students so I think structure will definitely help lessen the chaos.
Thank you, God, for blessing me with an uber amount of patience and the strength to keep going especially when the lessons don't go quite as planned. Thank you for calling me to be a teacher and for helping me grow and learn along the way.
Student teaching has had its ups and downs already. I struggle sometimes with controlling and keeping the attention of a class full of twenty plus kindergarten students with multiple inclusion students. It can be quite a zoo in the music classroom sometimes. Today, my teacher and I had a great chat about different methods to try on the crazier classes. Keeping the schedule flowing and full of variety while maintaining structure seems to be the key so far.
I've been up trying to come up with different ideas for my Friday classes since they seem to be the most interesting to teach. They are all wonderful students, I just have to learn how to cater to them as a class as well as individuals while maintaining my role as the teacher. I enjoy the challenges and my teacher is patient with me as I learn from my mistakes. I've come up with some new things to help keep the classes organized and structured and I'm excited to try them out tomorrow. Friday=off-the-wall students so I think structure will definitely help lessen the chaos.
Thank you, God, for blessing me with an uber amount of patience and the strength to keep going especially when the lessons don't go quite as planned. Thank you for calling me to be a teacher and for helping me grow and learn along the way.
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